Nice work. Very down to Earth. I know this isn't really cool, but would you consider reading and reviewing my fic? I need some constuctive criticism.
*Year Later*
I’m fifteen now and I’ve finally accomplished my life goal, to come to Japan. I roamed Kansai’s streets with hopes to find a job and an affordable apartment. After four non-English speaking restaurants and a grocery store I decided to try my luck with a small quant card shop a few miles from the airport. Its sign read: Yoshiro Card Shop in English with Japanese symbols above in a larger print. The inside was enchanting although the store seemed more of a desert than a city store, “Hello, are you open?”
“Hi, my name is Hiroshi Yoshiro, how a may I help you,” a fetching young man stated as he entered from a back room.
“I’m looking for a job.”
“I’ll get you an application,” the boy ran into a back room and quickly returned with the papers.
I took it, “Thanks,” I looked the application over, “I can’t really read this. Do you have an English version?”
“No.”
“Oh well, thanks anyways,” I handed the application back to Hiroshi.
“Hold up, it seems you need this job bad so I’ll help you out.”
“Thank you,” I said shyly.
“No problem, today the store isn’t too busy, anyways.”
After eleven minutes of work a red haired boy burst into the room, “Hiroshi,” he greeted!
“What,” Hiroshi shouted back?
“Who’s the girl,” the boy asked calmly?
“Lorraine Clems, she’s applying for a job,” Hiroshi explained, “and do you have to be so loud,” Hiroshi also spoke plainly now.
“Yeah, I do. Nice to meet you, Lorraine, and don’t worry I’m sure you’ll get the job. By the way my name’s Hiroki.”
“Hi,” I said with a slight smirk.
“What’s your address,” Hiroshi continued.
“I don’t have one.”
“What do you mean,” Hiroshi asked?
“I mean…since I just got here a couple of days ago I haven’t had time to learn it.”
“Oh so she’s staying with family,” Hiroki tried to make sense out of it all.
“Right,” I lied.
“Have you hand any work experience,” Hiroshi referred to back to the application?
“No, but I’m good with people and I love to help others.”
“Alright, do…never mind. How old are you?”
“Fifteen.”
i'll try to write more if i get a chance. hope you guys enjoy it.
Hard work never killed anybody but why try it.
Nice work. Very down to Earth. I know this isn't really cool, but would you consider reading and reviewing my fic? I need some constuctive criticism.
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