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Thread: Luckless Star

  1. #1
    Otaku seraphim is off to a good start seraphim's Avatar
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    Luckless Star

    Heres something that i just wrote minutes ago ^^
    Prolly got inspired by something lol

     click to show spoiler

    *False Messiah * Bleach Dynasty *Call me Ruru-chan*

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    Otaku lapislazuli is off to a good start lapislazuli's Avatar
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    Re: Luckless Star

    Interesting 'something', as you call it.
    Quote Originally Posted by seraphim View Post
    Especially if I’m gonna do it my whole life.
    I really like the last sentence, that ends it perfectly.
    You are now breathing manually. :P

    E&OE;

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    Otaku seraphim is off to a good start seraphim's Avatar
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    Re: Luckless Star

    Ooooh, really?

    thanks lapi ^^

    that last line really did kinda have a ring to it, even on me XD

    *False Messiah * Bleach Dynasty *Call me Ruru-chan*

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    Newbie Xyore is off to a good start Xyore's Avatar
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    Re: Luckless Star

    I must say that this story was really interesting, but the dialogue could use a bit of work. Also, it would make the layout a bit better if you were able to identify what were quotes and what was the narration. Despite these tiny errors, the story caught my attention. Bravo!
    Death takes a toll...
    Just hope it's your soul...

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