Thread: Record of Lodoss War: Armageddon

rom the diary of an Unknown Warrior:

How do you know your in the right? How do you know that what you are doing is the best you can?

The truth is: you don't. As I sit here, waiting for what's left of my current stage in life to finish, I look back at who I was, and who I am now. I was already broken, though I have hidden it well. I continue to fight, fight with what little steel and fire I have left...

I may have many years ahead of me, or today could be my last day on earth. You just don't know-nothing in this life is certain. One thing is though: right now, I'm alive and somewhat well, battling what demons I have and fighting the horrors within.....

What is it though that keeps me going: the pain of my life. The betrayals, the guilt, the rage, the sorrow. All the trappings and torments that have haunted me all my life I wear as an armor. Not much can scare me any more, but there are things that none can understand.

Many of my friends and someone who once loved me said that one day that the armor I wear will one day get too heavy, and that I will no longer be able to go on...and I told them I would continue to fight somehow. I would never give up, never be beaten. The day I finally go, it will not be easy, not quietly into the night. Only when the last of my blood falls from me, only when the body that keeps my soul anchored on this mortal coil lies shattered and broken in the field, will be the day I am gone, when the armor will be too heavy.


As take up my rifle, I get the sense that I am somehow going to my doom. The servos in my armor whine and moan as I move the great mass along...not many can come as far as I have: Betrayed and Betraying my family, and yet protecting those I call friend and family. I hurt them yes, but I have over come that...but still the pain is their. I just hope, that in the next life the gods will take pity on a poor, misguided creature such as myself. But I pray they do not judge too hastily, for I am deserving of little mercy. My crimes will be paid for eventually in blood, and not just blood, but in the tears of my commerades, for my family will shed no tears nor give any acknowledgement to my passing. If they do weep, it will be with joy that the monster that was both brother and son was finally laid to rest.

Why? What drove me to hurt, to betray that fragile trust, I know now that I was a fool for my actions, the murder of my father...the pain the men who came to collect me that day caused my mother and younger sisters, which ended with the murder and violation of my elder sister Patil. I allowed it to happen, though I could do nothing, and thus I was outcast by the remnants of my family, bid never to return for taking up the sword and for the actions of my superiors agianst them. For the murder of my own sire...which I did without any thoughts.

But now, I shall perhaps redeem my self.