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Old Jan 18, 2008, 10:52 AM   #1 (permalink)
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~The Mistress~
 
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Will to Succeed

She looked out the window of the of her bedroom with a sigh. The raging storm outside would have been welcome with the way she was feeling right now.She longed for the stability and pattern she saw in the storm. At least it was kinda' stable. Nothing like her heart...

At the moment she felt as if at any moment she could be engulfed by the myriads of emotions going through her. Each new and unfamiliar emotion threatening to overcome her and take the last shreads of her sanity. Why did they seem to want to eat her alive and leave nothing of her previous self behind? Of the life she had left behind?

Amiss those thoughts her attention was drawn back into her bedroom. Plain, uninteresting walls that said nothing of her personality, the passion that burned within her heart. But still no regrets.

She had been chanting that since the day she'd left. No regrets, her own personal mantra to ease her soul. She would never EVER go back to that hell hole she had once called home. She'd rather eat from the trash than go back to that abusive, self righteous place again.

Still life wasn't exactly perfect right now. She had always dreamt of something more when she was young. A life with family and friends, good times to spare, and the peace she had always longed for. That made her sigh again. Dwelling on the past wouldn't help at all now. Not when she was a thousand plus miles away from home in a place she knew nothing about. Not when she was all alone.

She could distinctly remeber someone asking her was it worth it, when she first started having "problems" at home. Was it? Somehow her eyes fell on a photgraph on her dresser. She rose from her spot on the floor and gently lifted it from its resting place. Staring at the figure in it brought a smile that hadn't graced her features since she'd left. Yeah, it was worth it.

For every pain she had endured and every injustice she had suffered it was well worth it. She would never forget why she had come here. That would be worse than anything else could possibly be.

With that thought in mind she stood and retrieved her satchel. It was time to work. Time to survive. And, well time to live. She would grab life by the horns and ride it until she couldn't hang on any longer. And maybe by then she wouldn't need to hang on so tightly. Maybe someone else would help her to hang on.

But unitl then she wasn't giving up. No use winning the battle, and then losing the war.


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