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Thread: I'm hers

  1. #1
    Otaku Caixa 2006 Champion Corvus may be famous one day Corvus may be famous one day Corvus's Avatar
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    I'm hers

    Imparting intimate ideas in innocence,
    Mastering me, making man move.

    Her head hangs, hovering. hazel,
    Eager eyes: endearing, entrancing, evaluating,
    Requiting, redefining reality. restless romance,
    She slinks. silence settles softly
    and I'm hers.
    Last edited by Corvus; May 18, 2008 at 07:00 PM. Reason: none

    ... and join my rebellion against time.

  2. #2
    Fallen Angel PhoenixSara may be famous one day PhoenixSara's Avatar
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    Re: I'm hers

    Imparting intimate ideas in innocence,
    Mastering me, making man move.
    I like the opening of the poem, and just like any other truth eveything starts with conversation. it's like she didn't give you a choice on how you felt on this one though like she put you in a trance. but over all it's a short beautiful poem. I also like how it flowed not really following conventional way of writing. this one is beautiful Corvus
    "In your arms is where i will be, I love you till my forever ends."
    Clan Rainstorm 2nd Company, Kunoichi Leader
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    Corvus (May 19, 2008)

  4. #3
    Chtonian Slayer Astaroth may be famous one day Astaroth's Avatar
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    Re: I'm hers

    I would have to say that this is the most unique style of poetry I have ever read
    The poem itself is short but your usage of words is what binded the poem together and those words themselves stand out and highlight the poem and grabs the readers attention
    Amazing and keep up the great work....^_^
    DO NOT MAKE ME UNLEASH MY INNER DEMON

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    Corvus (May 19, 2008)

  6. #4
    Otaku heartless is off to a good start
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    Re: I'm hers

    wow its a great poem.and a nice title by the way.i enjoyed reading it.and i like this part the most.

    Eager eyes: endearing, entrancing, evaluating,
    Requiting, redefining reality. restless romance,
    sometimes i wish i never existed
    -heartless.DY-025

  7. #5
    Otaku Caixa 2006 Champion Corvus may be famous one day Corvus may be famous one day Corvus's Avatar
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    Re: I'm hers

    Thanks all around, you guys lightened my day. I've thanked all of you but instead of bothering with silly reasons for each personI've posted them below.

    PhoenixSara:
    Like everyone else, took the time required to understand it. Your opinion is appreciated as you accept the beauty behind it and not the somewhat pervy view it could potentially be taken from.

    Astaroth:
    Other then just being amazing and identifying exactly what I intended you ( I just might have to take you at your offer in your siggy... hrm =P)

    Heartless:
    a good quality post and appreciation for poetry. (those lines are the ones I spent the longest on making sure everything fit)
    Last edited by Corvus; May 19, 2008 at 07:27 PM. Reason: color duh!

    ... and join my rebellion against time.

  8. #6
    Otaku katsoyori33 is off to a good start katsoyori33's Avatar
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    Re: I'm hers

    I'm no perv. So I dont look at it in that way. Its a very beautiful poem. Great work!!


    Meow. :3

  9. #7
    Otaku Caixa 2006 Champion Corvus may be famous one day Corvus may be famous one day Corvus's Avatar
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    Re: I'm hers

    Has anyone noticed that it spells I'm hers throughout? I mean that's practically my signature... I always have a message in the capital letters in my poems.

    ... and join my rebellion against time.

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