This must have been hard to do, rhyme and stay with the the 5-7-7-5-7-7 guide line. Good job is all I have to say.
This is a style called Sedoka 5-7-7-5-7-7. Derived from Waka. Kamo is the main river in Kyoto.
Much foes we helped smash.
Lament for those turned to ash.
As I see incence ascend,
On moon-lit kamo,
I realize what I defend.
This stream again lets me know.
Kamo is the artery of waterways in Kyoto. Much of the culture revolves around that river. I went through a deployment then was transferred to another unit that then deployed to intercept slave trades. I had begun to think the whole world was not worth fighting for but my trips to kyoto and seeing the masses gathered in prayer or revelry make me remember. I wrote this there now.
Last edited by beast; Dec 21, 2008 at 12:24 AM. Reason: typo
Nice poem, dude! Your references to Japan are beautiful.