Erg...
Yeah, I know random journals are where its at from the poop-ularity stand point.
But sometimes you have to be personal and semi-serious.
-Please keep in mind, what you are reading is in large part, a metaphore.-
I have been viewing a certain aspect of my life, as watering a dead tree. And no matter how much water I bring forth... The tree is still dead.
So why would I nourish something which shows no signs of life? Many reasons.
1: Something in my soul is telling me to keep watering. Dunno why... It just isn't time to stop. Hell, I have been working at it for a long while now. Something is telling me there is a reason. If I stop now, I will just be the freakin' crazy lady who watered a dead tree for a half decade.
2: I am not 100% sure of anything. Including that this tree is completely dead. But I may not be watering this tree, for the sake of the tree either. If said tree is indeed dead. It has probably been decomposing from the inside. Ready to keel over, as I have softened the earth around it. Perhaps everything has happened so that this dead tree can be a source of nourishment to everything around it which still lives. Maybe its carcass was chocking off a tiny sprout that has been ready to shoot up and grow tall and mighty in its place....?
3: What about this crazy lady who continues to water this damned dead tree...? Perhaps it is this act of watering which keeps things in perspective for me. Reminds me of the strength it takes to continue to obey my inner self, when there seems to be no way to make sence of the commands. Perhaps it is the sincere peace in knowing that I don't haave to understand the reasons behind why I feel inclined to take certain actions. Trusting intuition is the equivilant to trusting in a power greater than myself.
Last edited by Peach_follows; Feb 04, 2009 at 06:12 PM.
... Not Ever Again...
^^ Maybe you should place a commemorative item on this dead tree and pay your respects for all the time it has spent with you. Always return to water it once again for the sake of its existence within your life, but move on and find a seed that needs growing.
--metaphorically speaking, of course.
Or, you could cut the tree down and make good use of the wood before it is useless. Make it into something that'll always be there. Metaphorically.
That way something new can grow there.
'Cause you give me something / That makes me scared, alright / This could be nothing / But I'm willing to give it a try / Please give me something
'Cause someday I might call you from my heart
Wow Soshi... that is almost precicely my intention.Originally Posted by Soshi Kitai
Cut it down and rebuild it into something useful eh? Something permanent....
It's not impossible I suppose. But doubtful. Questionable if the wood would be strong enough, at this point, to be of any use to me. Not ever tree wants to be turned into family table.
... Not Ever Again...
Make masks then. Wood masks are fantastic.
I hate to let it loose like this, but i'm going to be straight with you. It seems, for some reason or another, that you are referring to someone in your life, now from there, i have a gut feeling the 'someone' may be a guy, and from there ill say its a boyfriend ???
what do you think. lol haha
it may be wrong, if so then i wasnt quite catching the phrase i suppose.
1st Sig finished 12-20-09
ooooo Someone give the man a Nobel Prize.
'Cause you give me something / That makes me scared, alright / This could be nothing / But I'm willing to give it a try / Please give me something
'Cause someday I might call you from my heart
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