Thread: Bad English

Been thinking about bad english, lately. Or should I say: Old English.

Did'ya know that Shakespeare was horrible at English?
At language in general.

Then again, everyone at that time was awful at English.
It's because at that time, and the time before then, and a few more after then, English wasn't structured. It had no real rules or real restrictions. People could use words and give them entirely different meanings...
People often think "Oh, well, at that time, that word meant something TOTALLY different- we just limited it with how streamlined we are nowadays."... but that's only half-true.

Y'see... words back then usually meant something TOTALLY different, because rarely did anyone have a REAL grasp on what the word meant! It wasn't just different back then, it was also DIFFERENT FOR ALMOST EVERY SINGLE PERSON back then!

So the poetic sounds of Shakespeare isn't jumbled up and odd sounding because it's for the poetic sense..... it's that way because the man didn't know how to "talk correctly".


Now am I against this?
Am I an upstanding citizen that follows the English language to the T?

Oh hell no. I suck at English. Mainly because there's so many rules in it!
It feels like for every word, there's a rule for it, a contradicting rule, and another contradicting rule in order for it to be used EXTREMELY SPECIFICALLY in a sentence.

For that, I never really liked English classes. I was always wrong because I had no idea WHY, TRULY WHY, we couldn't use certain words and phrases in certain ways.

Well, that, and I sucked with semicolons.
Everytime someone explains to me how a semicolon works, it just really sounds like semicolons DON'T NEED TO EXIST. ...I mean, gawd, a comma or a period could be there and it'd still make sense.



I digress.

I like bad English. I like how they went with the idea of "if it sounds right, it must be right!"... and then if it didn't make sense with each other, they would try to explain it with other sentences or gestures.
I thought that was much more interesting than how structured and restricted our sentences are nowadays. I mean, hell, not only does it give you extra personality points, but it also makes you connect to that person in a much more intimate matter - because they will know NO ONE ELSE like you for the way you word things.
Nowadays, we expect either pre-planned phrasing or hoity-toity lingual charm in order to see whether someone's unique with their words.

Sure, we have things such as "seeing things in a different light", but in just the same way, our sentences, no matter how badly grammared they are, can SHOW how we see things in a different light.

If a man calls a dog a partner nowadays. You either believe they're a policeman with a dog partner, or some weirdo who thinks dogs have the same sense as a human.
But back then, if a man were to call a dog someword like that of a partner, it shows a sense of working-together and trust - it shows a love for work and interaction. Because we get the FEELING of it.
...nowadays, we still can get the feeling of a word, but then English Majors and the students of the english majors - tell you that you're wrong and that you shouldn't even be talking or listening if you can't do it right.

.... I think they've restricted themselves too much.
I think we've all restricted ourselves too much.

If you fight me back with ideas such as "So you're saying we should just grunt?"

I'll say "Yes." Because if that's all it takes to give out all the information they need in order for them to understand how we feel, what we're thinking, and what we're planning - THEN PERFECT!
Language isn't there to sound smart, it isn't there to be structured to the most perfect gem - it's there to express.
And I wish we could express it in any way we truly wish (and no wannabes allowed), without being ignored and lectured of how we DIDNT DO IT RIGHT.

....hell, if that's the way they see it, I'd like to tell them EVERYTHING THEY'RE DOING WRONG. You aren't walking right. You aren't standing right. You aren't breathing right. You aren't thinking right.
If you want perfection, then prepare to get lectured by me - because I have the blood of a perfectionist, and KNOW what perfection is in its most limiting form.

......but just as in the sense that I don't follow that blood's tales of perfection, I don't tend to follow English's restricting laws...
...and I get bad grades because of it.


S'ya peop'l wit' y'r big faunsy and daunsy w'rds be'ah shut it!
W'rds aw an 'ay f' com-taukin'! N' if y' cn't 'Nderstand me, th'n buzz off!
Off wit' ye!