Thread: Some emotional rot.

Somethings broken.
Lost and never found.
Something important.
A major piece.
A blaring clue.
A piece of me, was lost.
And I can't find it in you.
Somethings broken.
Inside of me.
It wasn't you.
Or the one before.
Just the pieces
Already cluttering the floor.
Obviously I'm not that strong,
Not as strong as you think I am.
Not as strong as you want me to be.
I can't be.
Comprimised of parts that are never whole.
Strung together with shabby bits of string
and worn weathered bone.
My hearts always been broken.
I've never had a home.
I'll always be so very
Alone.




I wouldn't call this poetry. More like pretty mental vomit. that's why it's in my journal and not a post.
I've been feeling pretty messed up. I'm depressed. I'm exhausted.
I'm fifteen weeks pregnant and I'm too anxious and scared to go to the doctor. Totally irresponcible I know. But I will go soon. I swear. I just have to calm myself down and settle down a little so I can figure out where to go.
I feel really left behind and abandoned by a lot of people. I know I probably pushed them away but it doesn't make it hurt any less to know it's my fault.

Right now though. I really just want a burger. Pan fried at home with nothing but salt and pepper. I don't think I even want bread. Oh and some really cheesy mac and cheese. Yum.