+ Reply to Thread
Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 LastLast
Results 17 to 24 of 26

Thread: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

  1. #17
    Mage of Eternity Joe Mage is making a name for themselves Joe Mage is making a name for themselves Joe Mage's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    In the end, it doesn' really matter.
    Posts
    907
    Thanks
    26
    Thanked 47 Times in 44 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    I could c where the complaint 'bout number 6 could come from, but let's say; for arguement sake; that #6 includes atheism. I mean let's look at it from this point; polytheism is the belief in multiple Gods, monothemism is the belief in one God, and atheism is the belief in no God. So let's say that atheism is a sort of spiritual belief in the absence of any God. Lookin' at it in this manner, wouldn' that make #6 a little more valid, in a manner of speakin', as far as this thread is concerned? I'm jus' tryin' ta make the #6 part of the discussion a little less odious.

    Sanity doesn't exist, it's just an excuse cooked up by crazy people to justify their actions. My myspace page: www.myspace.com/joemage

  2. #18
    ~jUsT sMiLe~ _gwenibe_ may be famous one day _gwenibe_ may be famous one day _gwenibe_'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    In the gallery
    Posts
    1,376
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 35 Times in 31 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    if that's the case Joe mage (and if I'm reading your post right ^^; ). Then I would still feel that #6 was wrong. Because it's not the absence or the presence of god in your belief that can determine a functioning family. Whether your religious or not doesn't determine if your family is functioning or close one. And I think that's what Tsurara is getting at aswell.. ^^;

  3. #19
    anti-semantics Pub Quiz Champion tsurara may be famous one day tsurara may be famous one day tsurara's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Shikoku
    Posts
    1,308
    Thanks
    5
    Thanked 84 Times in 55 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    Aethiesm isn't spirituality... it's lack of it.

    Aetheists are not apologists by any stretch of the imagination... they reject religion (all religion) as divisive idiocy.

    It isn't a spiritual (God/spirit/fairy/magic/superstition/ghost-based) belief system. It is the refusal to have a spiritual belief system. Aethists reguard the notion of Gods, Goddesses, prayers and miracles as pure fantasy. But for the most part, they live secular lives. They don't have group meetings, recruit others or sit around and tell their kids before bedtime that there is no God. They live their lives absent of religion.

    Aetheism (Secular Humanism) has no set system, no congregation, no rulers, no leaders, no holy books, no doctrine, no creed, no commandments, no set morals...

    Anyone who harbors "spiritual" beliefs of any sort would cease to be an aethist and become automatically agnostic. ie. someone who believes in the ~possibility~ of Gods/Spirits but adheres to no specific belief system.

    Agnostics would be a hard sell too... since their vague acceptance of the possibility of a God doesn't leave them any more likely to have "strong beliefs" about anything in the spiritual realm. For the most part, agnostics and aethists are in the same boat, lifestyle-wise... it's only in their conviction that there is no God and the vague idea that their may be a God that they differ.

  4. #20
    Mage of Eternity Joe Mage is making a name for themselves Joe Mage is making a name for themselves Joe Mage's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    In the end, it doesn' really matter.
    Posts
    907
    Thanks
    26
    Thanked 47 Times in 44 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    Well then, let's say that if we were ta change #6 ta "Discipline," wouldn' that still include, ta some degree, any spiritual aspect? Given the fact that some of the religious societies in the world believe that one's own misdeeds often follow one even after death. That one's own actions have consequences that will often follow them inta the afterlife? Is that not also another form of "Discipline?"

    Sanity doesn't exist, it's just an excuse cooked up by crazy people to justify their actions. My myspace page: www.myspace.com/joemage

  5. #21
    Banned CTD High Jump Champion, Cop-For-This Champion, Soap Bubble Champion, Gandys Quest Champion, Kill Time in Your Office Champion, Slow Motion Champion, Moodys Magical Eye Champion, The Fridge Champion, Dangerous Fishing Champion, Panda Golf 2: Christmas Edition Champion, Driving Mad Champion, Head to Head Champion, Super Headers Champion, Penguin Arcade Champion, Chopper Challenge Champion, Air Dodge Champion, Chopper Chase Champion, F/A-18 Hornet Champion, Snow Boarding Champion, Spaceman Bob`s Great Escape Champion, Space Cowboy Champion, Rons Free Fall Champion, Gandys Quest Champion, Black Dragon Champion, Samegame and Champion, Mayan Mask Champion, 42 Games Champion, Cubedelic Champion, Smaugs Schatkist Champion, Python Champion, Thor Towers Champion Mini Dev is off to a good start
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    1,083
    Thanks
    41
    Thanked 25 Times in 25 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    Quote Originally Posted by Arrianna View Post
    Fantastic Families: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    No, I am not reviewing the book but since we always seem to be discussing relationships of some kind or another I thought I would list the six steps as I have had them described to me (I don't own the book ).
    1. Commitment
    2. Spending Time Together
    3. Effective Communications
    4. Express Appreciation
    5. Problem Solving in a Crises
    6. Strong Spiritual Commitment
    Commitment is the first because of all six it is the most important.


    So what do you think? Agree, disagree?


    The source of this list and the basis of the book is from a survey of "14,000 families studied over twenty-five years" all over the world.
    I agree wiht them, they are all the things my family needs at times it's nothing new but just common sense basically. It's excellent to see them all in a family, i have no other things to add to this list this aobut sums it up for me.

  6. #22
    Femmebot Rehab Colt Crouse Champion, Bookworm Champion, Hangman Champion, Connect 2 Champion Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Friendly Fridley
    Posts
    1,477
    Thanks
    124
    Thanked 140 Times in 121 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    Well I agree with all 6 of these... But I would not say that theres a KEY to building a strong family. I think there is soo much more than a list of six things that one needs to build a strong family. Number 6 is not even necessary (as tsurara has pointed out). And these are so broad... Raising a strong family requires so much focus on the details. Its small details that are the most likely to weaken a family. (I say this as both a daughter and a mother)
    Take number 5 for example.... problem solving?! That sounds nice, but crisis' come in various levels of intensity. Most human minds don't function very well when thrown into crisis. Even when you're the most resourceful, problem solving person in the world. When its YOUR crisis, its hard to even see past your nose. I would say more than problem solving... to be open to outside intervention. But I guess that in itself is a solution.
    ... Not Ever Again...

  7. #23
    Lady Barronmore Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    3,259
    Thanks
    19
    Thanked 140 Times in 108 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    Quote Originally Posted by tsurara View Post
    I find #6 to promote the common Western notion of the moral superiority of Christians over everyone else.
    Then you are reading that superiority into the subject based on your own resentment and not the study itself since, as I mentioned before, this study was done in countries all over the world with all kinds of religions. It says "Strong Spiritual Commitment" not "Christian Faith" and your rejection of it is actually a rejection of all world religions not just Christianity. But then you have made that clear that you believe as an atheist that you don't think religion is necessary for anyone so at least you are consistent.

    That still brings back my point however that in this massive study they found it to be a contributing factor for strong families. If you don't want it then don't have it but if you really believe in live and let live why should you even care that it helps others? Answer, you shouldn't unless you don't really believe that everyone should be allowed to use what helps them if it involves religion.

    As for it being in the realm of the discussion, sure, I just didn't want to turn it into another atheists vs the rest of the world discussion instead of one on the family.

    Quote Originally Posted by Shodokan View Post
    I'm pretty anti religious so I'll try hard to explain why number 6 is up there without being too harsh. Religious people tend to be obedient, devoted, commited or however you want to word it. So they're more likely to stick with their family no matter what because of their commitment.
    We know you are Shodokan, all the same I cannot argue with your point of view. After all not everyone sees being "obedient, devoted, commited" as a bad thing.



    Now for my own point of view in my *cough*cough* years of life (ok, I am older then most of you but Len is still older then me) I have seen these principles in action more times then I can count. All of them. The way I see it having information like this cannot do anything but help us. If what we want, our goal in life, is to have a strong family we can use this list as a set of goals. Sure it isn't easy and we aren't perfect but it is a great check list. Want to be married for your entire life?
    • Step one, find someone who will commit and not just think it will be nice IF it lasts.
    • Step two, make sure and make time for them and your family especially after you are married. Dating doesn't stop once you say "I Do".
    • Step three, let the others in your family know what you want and how you feel. No one can read minds it isn't their fault they don't know if you don't tell them. Work together with your spouse to decide on rules for your children and enforce them together. Children will try and play parents off each other and if you don't communicate you lose.
    • Step four, tell them you love them and let them know that you appreciate what they do. DON'T take them for granted.
    • Step five, work out difficulties in a crises together instead of just giving up. If handled together trials will make your family stronger.
    • Step six, have a common spiritual belief that you can teach your children and use to unit your family instead of creating conflict between you, your spouse, and your children.

    I have seen more times then I can count what happens to families when just one of those isn't there. No they don't all get divorced but their family does suffer from it. On the bright side though if you work toward it you can have the confidence to know you are increasing your chances of having that strong family you want.

    In my experience the most important when looking at getting married is #1&6. One because if there is no commitment it just won't last and six because that is the sort of thing that needs to be in place from the beginning of the marriage. Whatever your belief is be it Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, and yes, atheist/agnostic you need to have the same spiritual belief structure as your spouse or you WILL have issues later when you have children on determining how to raise them.



    Now with all that said, and the long post it is, I am afraid that it is also my last post for a while. My own family is going through our own crises and I need to be there for them. Good luck and best wishes.

    l Stone Hold l Now We're Cooking! l Thanks to Kaos for the awesome sig!

  8. #24
    Nisou Tenshi Hot Shots Champion, Elroy Learns To Fly Champion, Daves Castle Hunt Champion, Mom-Jongg! Champion, Uncle Sam Champion Priestess Angel may be famous one day Priestess Angel may be famous one day Priestess Angel's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Right where you think I am
    Posts
    548
    Thanks
    18
    Thanked 21 Times in 17 Posts

    Re: 6 Proven Steps to Building a Strong Family

    All the steps make sense to me. I do agree that the six steps are very crucial factors in having a strong and functional family.

    As for the issue regarding number six, this is how I see it. I can understand how it can contribute to a family. And I have to say why does a strong spiritual commitment automatically mean that it means just religions such as Christianity?? Religion is just a commitment to a belief just like atheism is. Why can't number six just be considered a strong commitment to some sort of belief system?

    Instead of thinking that a spiritual commitment has to involve some form of religion it can be considered just a strong commitment to one belief.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to Priestess Angel For This Useful Post:

    Joe Mage (Mar 16, 2008)

+ Reply to Thread
Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. 20 steps Back
    By Shippo101 in forum Poems
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: Jun 08, 2007, 12:39 PM
  2. Building up your own image
    By souichiro_arima in forum Cyber Lounge
    Replies: 50
    Last Post: May 05, 2007, 09:54 PM
  3. tech related- help building dvd shelf-
    By jaderabbit in forum Tech Center
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: Oct 15, 2006, 06:23 PM
  4. Who do you think will win the strong or the weak
    By RAve master in forum The Thread Vault
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: May 01, 2005, 06:30 AM
  5. Replies: 5
    Last Post: Dec 05, 2004, 05:24 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts