Thread: Chuck Norris Jokes:D:

Gee.. >.< the jokes are funny.. but why him anyway? The jokes kinda make him sound like the best guy in the world...

I heard a few...

-The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably
-Population in china boosted two fold nine months after Chuck Norris went visiting china
-When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
-Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris
-They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody
-Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday
-Pee Wee Herman got arrested for masturbating in public. The same day, Chuck Norris got an award for masturbating in public.

i know what you mean but they are halarious i can post some tomorrow

Well indeed.. i asked a few friends about this since they been telling the jokes about him at school... but they don't know heck why it's him.. lol

Hopefully someone here can explain >.<

Originally Posted by RayMe

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody

lol That's the best one. ^_^


If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger have all died and are in Heaven. Each of them hope to occupy the seat next to God. God asks Vin Diesel why he thinks he should have the seat and Vin replies, "I believe... I should have the seat because of the virtuosity in my toughness and pride." Arnie says, "I believe... that I should be the one sitting next to you because of all my achievements." God then turns to Chuck Norris, who replies with, "I believe... you are sitting in my seat."

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

"You see because of bruce lee dying people think that chuck norris is the best now because bruce lee taught him how to fight and supposely chuck norris's made up move and best move is the round house kick, but actually to tell you the truth. Bruce lee made it. You see bruce made a style of his own, which consisted of five different style to come up with his own. Called Jeet Kune Do.
Anyways after bruce lee died and so did his son, really chuck norris is the living proof that bruce was live. Without Bruce Lee! Chuck norris who you know today WOULD NOT EXSIST!!!!
So yeah that is my rant about bruce lee and why he was better.
If Bruce lee and chuck norris got in a fight then BRUCE LEE WOULD OWN!!! ALL!
Bruce lee is god and the devil. He is a superior being compared to chuck norris.
But sadly he was not immortal so he died.
By an overdose!"-By Shiratsu!

If you wish to fight in this discussion, then ask the user of this account to tell me and surely we will discuss my friends.

For now good bye!
xD

"GO BRUCE LEE!!!" XO

Bruce Lee is way better than chuck norris. Bruce Lee taught chuck everything he knows. He mastered five martail arts and created his own. Called Jeet Kun Do. Chuck norris would get his but kicked by bruce Lee any day of the week. Bruce Lee perfected the round house kick chuck loves so much. Bruce Lee even creatd the phrase move like water. He is by far the graetest martail artist ever. He tops Jet LI, Jackie Chan , Jason Stathom, and chuck norris. They can only hope to be a 1/4 of what Bruce Lee is. All of them continue to live in his shadow. He might of only made three movies but they are better than any of chuck's work.............

of course chuck norris enthusiasts will counter that you can't kill chuck norris, which is why bruce lee died and chuck norris lived, Martin Z.


I'll sadly admit I enjoyed the fad when it was still funny, but that was about 2, 3 years ago now. Now I find the jokes tired and childish. People who inject that chuck norris is god are the same people who claim they're jesus as a joke. I'm happy to say I'm over it and therefore will NOT be giving any CN jokes for the sake of the world. All you have to do is go to the official website to see them all anyway.