Thread: do girlfriends/boyfriends ruin friendships?

oh heck yeah! well not ruin... but having a G/F deffinately changes your friendship... I mean u spend time with your group and ur happy but then the G/F comes and you start spending more time with her.. plus u start meeting ur G/F group and then the family >.< (meeting family = HARD!)... so you spend less time with your friends(in some cases).... but there are this extreme cases in which your G/F doesnt like this person you know... thats tough... you have to choose... but I mean, it also depends on what time of relationship u are developing with your G/F... so it doesnt ruin friendships... it might even make a friendship stronger... but it deffinately changes

hell yea they do. i know. my bf wanted me to break off ties with my friends, this is in 5th grade, and told me i couldnt hang out with noone but him. i eventually got tired off him in like A DAY!! but i think it's a jealous issue. they want all te attentio to go to them

Ah, this topic. This is an issue I'm hearing more of every day :sigh:

I think the act of a person being in a relationship has many factors that can ruin their current friendships. One, could be the actual girlfriend or boyfriend who thrives for the attention and time that would be used for the friends. Another, could be the friend who's in the relationship, actually cutting out their time and attention for their current partner. Or even, it could be the friend(s) who's not in the relationship distancing themselves themselves... as well as many more scenarios.

There have been a few times where I myself, have been in a situation similar to this, with the irony of the friends saying "Friends over b/f-g/fs", and then nearly completely ignoring me until the relationship was over/the partner left ^^; Even now, there's one person I was really close to, but he distanced himself (and is still doing so) from all his female friends to be with his girlfriend. It's sad, but hey, that's how some people's priorities are. In general I just feel bad for the people who do that, and then when something happens in the relationship and they try to go back to their friends, they've all left..


I thnk this kind of situation could be avoided if A)The Dater can balance time between friends and girl/boyfriends, B)The Datee can accept the balancing of time their partner is doing, and is doing the same for his/her friends, C)The friend(s) outside the relationship can accept their friend can't be there as much, but is still there for them and D)Everyone can go to one another if there's an issue going on in this mix of relationships, all of them can put their foot down when the time is right.

In the end, this is probably easier said than done, so maybe even just keeping in mind that everyone has feelings and no one likes to be put behind someone constantly

I had the same sort of thing happen to me. we always used to hang and stuff, then all of a sudden they got boyfriends, It was fine by me and all, I couldn't care less. But what was really annoying was that when we went out as friends, the boyfriends had to come along, it's not the fact that I didn't get along wit them, it was the fact that instead of having fun, they were constantly worried about how they looked or acting "proper" around their boyfriends, so we never did any of the crazy fun things we used to do together.

You need to have time with your friends aswell as keep time for your boyfriends and girlfriends, it's ok to mix it and all, just not constantly as my friends did. It was hard for me when I was having trouble to talk to my friends cause their boyfriends were around... thats kinda the reason why we grew apart.

aaahh the old age question......well i wouldnt say it would but if as you say tht she's really nice, then u should be happy for him and give him time....dnt B***h abt it to him......jus say tht i feel like we're spending less time together but then again, if u were in his shoes like most ppl said already, u would want to spend time with her alot.....anyways as the relationship goes on, they wouldnt be spending as much time together as now so chill n give it time, it'll go into a routine, where he's either with u chill and hanging out and then he goes out with his gf...so chill dude.

@ nightwish: It all depends on how you look at it either you think of it as being robbed of a friend or instead of gaining one. It is inevitable that your friend finds that someone it's just a matter of time really. Its natural that you guys no longer have the same amount of quality time as he is giving his gf. Overall it just needs a bit of getting used to. Besides if you were in the same position as your friend is wouldn't you be doing the same?
Even you think she is nice and all that, maybe you'll get along with her too. Who knows your friend saw something in her maybe you will too and later include her in your circle of friends. I highly doubt that you'll lose him (after all its 8 years of friendship; no one can just put that aside)

As for me, I don't believe that friendship could be ruin by bf/gf's. It takes a lot more to ruin that bond. I've learned to adjust as I have been in that position numerous times, besides no matter how short you spend your time with your friend or even how hardly you get to talk to them anymore it is believing that the friendship is still there that makes it work.

personally,no.if u think so,than u should learn 2 cope with it,lyk talk to dat person n get 2 know them coz it doesn't hurt 2 know them.In fact its a gr8 way 2 meet new ppl.