kedar

Dear members,

Let's assume that you are invited as a guest speaker to a television (or radio) talk show, where you are present to discuss about marriage (or "living together" - whatever floats your boat), as it relates to you. The anchor poses the following two questions:

1) What would you say are some healthy and/or unhealthy motives (i.e. reasons) for marriage? (Optional: Why?)
2) What are your expectations of marriage? That is: If you are married, what has marriage done for you? Or if you are not married, what do you think marriage will do for you?

The public now awaits your response. =)

equinn

1) What would you say are some healthy and/or unhealthy motives (i.e. reasons) for marriage? (Optional: Why?)

well for children to be brought up in a safe and happy inveroment , a happy family
as some people know single perents sometimes have it hard looking after there kids and may be in all sorts of bother in a marrage the mother and father are both there so its more likely the children have time with there pernts and there usualy is disapline...

also if u catholic u shouldnt have sex and what not till ur married so if ur like that thats another reason ....



2) What are your expectations of marriage? That is: If you are married, what has marriage done for you? Or if you are not married, what do you think marriage will do for you?


i donno what marrage may do for me but i plan to be with the guy im with for a long time and if he asks me to marry him and i still feel the same love for him i will marry him (even in its aposed by anyone)
but to be honest i dont have expectations for marrage they have there ups and downs and no one person in a marrage can say they have never had a fight or something

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Sazzy

I think it is not a good sign of a healthy marriage if someone gets married because other people are getting married and its only a step up. When they fail to see that marriage is about working together fully with another adult and dealing with any kind of situation. If people only marry because it is the "In" thing then its not what marriage is about at all in my eyes.

I can understand why some people get married after the female is pregnant, so they can give the child a stable home. But at the same time it isn't a healthy way to bring up a child. If you are both in a loving, committed relationship then getting married before the child is born is just showing the commitment. However, getting married just because you are pregnant or you got someone pregnant, isn't always right either. Getting married when you don't truly love someone isn't going to bring the child into a stable relationship. It can cause more hassle then its worth in reality.

As some may know, I am hoping to marry my boyfriend and start a life together. It sound weird providing I met here on AO and its not a "proper" relationship, but that doesn't mean some people understand how I feel. I love my boyfriend so much that I am not going to marry him just so he can stay in this country. I truly love him and we want to let everyone know how we feel, how committed we are to working this out as a couple and being really supportive of each other.

Marriage is something I won't take likely. I never even thought I would ever get married till one conversation Solking and I had that got me thinking. I hated leaving his side, I felt like I was being dragged away and I had no say in anything. I can't imaging permanently leaving Solking at all. I don't think anyone could when they find their soul mate, if you believe in soul mates that is. Life would just fall apart for me if we broke up. So to us, when we get married, its to show our love and appreciation to each other. Showing how we can't bare to be apart and marriage just shows that bond to others.

Some people can say that marriage is just paper. But it is more than that. To me, the ring is the most important. Showing that I have chose to spend my life with the one I love and that they mean more to me than any one else in the world. Its not just a piece a metal, its a great representation in my eyes. As well as a commitment to God to to be true to each other, but to be true and faithful to ourselves. I would rather get married to show my growth in life I suppose. Then to not get married and never really have someone who isn't committed to me and that they can break my heart so easily that its just another boring relationship to someone else.

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desxms

My motive for marriage is finding pleasant company.
I expect him to sign a prenup and be young at heart.

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http://www.bonjourshop.com/

San

1) I think the only unhealthy motive is when one or both are forced into the marriage, or at all if you marry without feelings for eachother.

Even tho, let's not forget that marriage originally was invented to combine the money and possessions of two families/clans, and not for love. this is what it turned into over the centuries.

2) i am going to marry in fall next year so all works out the way me and my fiance want to. The reason of marriage is simply love and the feeling we both have thinking about it. When I was younger i never wanted to marry or to have kids, but with my husband I just want to and I can't even say why. It's just the feeling he causes inside of me.
But I also think that it is neither necessary to marry to spend your life together nor to raise a child. It is all just about the way you feel for eachother.
I am not expecting anything from marriage, but having a companion for the rest of my life. And of course, at least to me, it gives the feeling of a more secure relationship, where the other one won't just turn his back on you because of a small fight or because he met someone more interesting.
But that also comes due to the fact that people don't just marry after knowing each other for 1 day.
Even tho I must admit me and my hubby were like that xD but that's a different story xD
When you meet the right one you just know it ^^