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Thread: Rapists

  1. #97
    Devoted Otaku Shodokan may be famous one day Shodokan may be famous one day Shodokan's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    I have a question before I comment on anything. Lasura are you the user from Costa Rica?
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  2. #98
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    O.o Costa Rica? No, i have no connection with Costa Rica as far as I know, why such an odd question?

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  3. #99
    Devoted Otaku Shodokan may be famous one day Shodokan may be famous one day Shodokan's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    Nevermind it's not important. Your emotions of you and your ex boyfriend seem a bit off how old are you guys 14 and 15?
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  4. #100
    Otaku psychical is off to a good start psychical's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    Quote Originally Posted by Lasura View Post
    Well it might be true, but isn't love just a "mulitude" of many feelings? How one sees love is different for every person. To some it might not even seem love when, to that person it is the love of their life.
    My parents would think I'm just crazy to like a man who I have never seen in my life, they would call it a "crush", but I know I've never felt anything stronger in my life, I know I've never felt nicer with a man, I know we can be together forever
    I or you might say that if you went for blackmail to get a man's attention, it is not love, it's just obsession or lust or something, but maybe to that person, it was the strongest feeling he/she had ever felt, and he/she saw rape and blackmail as the only way out... How can we say "you never loved"? Of course the person might have done a very wicked thing, which we wouldn't do to our loved ones, but it was love, it was showing love, it was waiting for love to him/her.

    Example from real life:
    My ex had left me, the next day he came to talk to me by my window and he said he wants me back and that he simply was trying to show how much he means to me by leaving me (because I kept telling him to stop drinking and it made him mad ). I said that he won't be playing such games with me. Then he got into my room through my window (I was freaked out), hugged me tight and sat down with me in his lap. My I might say he was trying to rape me! It was against my will and I didn't like him doing that even the slightest bit. But to him, at that point, such rather violent action seemed like the only way to show his love, by holding me tight and making me feel safe and loved with him. It didn't work of course, but I know he loved me. It's just I didn't love him anymore and couldn't see his actions as love at that point.
    How other people experience the "feeling of love" -- which I'll have to refer to from this point on as "luv" -- varies from person to person. One person could experience it as a sort of fever; another, a kind of gushing from within; yet another, sexual arousal... and so on. But I have good reason to believe that love, unlike "luv", does not differ from person to person at all. It's the principle of the thing. (And maybe we'll have to reopen the "love" discussion over at the other thread after all.)

    It might not be that clear to those overcome by emotion at first, but there's a difference. Why do a good deal people who "love" one another at first fall apart later on, in a matter of years, months, weeks, and (gasp!) sometimes days? Could it be that they were lured into the "relationship trap" by emotions that turned out later on to be misleading? Recall that emotions can be irrational -- for instance, we could have fears of harmless things such as blankets, kittens, or eggs.

    Stray, impulsive feelings could also cause people to do things they'd regret later on. An immense desire to possess something could lead someone to steal it; an intense hatred could lead to murder if left unchecked. And maybe the feeling of "luv" -- if misguided, could lead someone to want to possess someone as one would a toy or doll or pet, sexually or otherwise.

    Love, not "luv", is something absolutely good, and that I'm absolutely sure of. And because it is only good, it follows that all truly loving actions should never have even a hint of malice to them.

    Therefore, rape is not a loving act. And people who do love (not just the romantic variety) do not coerce others to "love" them back or at least stay with them in return. That's not being loving; that's being selfish.
    Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose.

  5. #101
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    I still must disagree with you. By your theory, most people I know wouldn't even be capable of loving (my best friend, for example), by your theory I would have to admit that I have never loved before and that I neither love now. Love can't be perfect, it can't be "perfectly good", humans are still quite selfish, evne if I can truly say I would do as much as suffer for eternity for my bf, I know there will be times, when I feel mad at him, when I shout at him, when I pay too little attention to him, it's bad things to do, but it doesn't mean i don't love him. And, if my relationship with my current bf fails, I would die if I would be sticking with your theory and would have to say: "Then it wasn't love."
    I broke up with my ex and I am still quite angry at him, but I still know I loved him very much and I still would die if it would save his life. I could never bare to say: "It wasn't love."
    You must be either a very strong girl, or you must have had too litle serious relationships, if you can bare with it...

    But lets stop talking about this, because we are surely getting too far from the topic...

    As for Shodokan:
    O.o No I am 18 and he must be... 21 now, i don't remember. Yes, I am quite childish. But I don't see how my emotions towards him can be childish... He simply is still into me, and I try to border myself as far away from him as I can just because of this reason.
    I might have overexaggerated a bit when I said I've never talked to him after what happenned, because I have actually exchanged some e-mails with him, mostly simply to find out whether he's over me. But unfortunately he still hasn't found a girl and so I don't feel safe around him. Don't know what's childish about that- he hit me in the face! ^^ lol
    If this still doesn't clear confusion, you could PM me telling why you think it's childish, because this is not the "why your emotions are a little bit off" thread

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  6. #102
    Otaku psychical is off to a good start psychical's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    Quote Originally Posted by Lasura View Post
    I still must disagree with you. By your theory, most people I know wouldn't even be capable of loving (my best friend, for example), by your theory I would have to admit that I have never loved before and that I neither love now. Love can't be perfect, it can't be "perfectly good", humans are still quite selfish, evne if I can truly say I would do as much as suffer for eternity for my bf, I know there will be times, when I feel mad at him, when I shout at him, when I pay too little attention to him, it's bad things to do, but it doesn't mean i don't love him. And, if my relationship with my current bf fails, I would die if I would be sticking with your theory and would have to say: "Then it wasn't love."
    I broke up with my ex and I am still quite angry at him, but I still know I loved him very much and I still would die if it would save his life. I could never bare to say: "It wasn't love."
    You must be either a very strong girl, or you must have had too litle serious relationships, if you can bare with it...

    But lets stop talking about this, because we are surely getting too far from the topic...

    As for Shodokan:
    O.o No I am 18 and he must be... 21 now, i don't remember. Yes, I am quite childish. But I don't see how my emotions towards him can be childish... He simply is still into me, and I try to border myself as far away from him as I can just because of this reason.
    I might have overexaggerated a bit when I said I've never talked to him after what happenned, because I have actually exchanged some e-mails with him, mostly simply to find out whether he's over me. But unfortunately he still hasn't found a girl and so I don't feel safe around him. Don't know what's childish about that- he hit me in the face! ^^ lol
    If this still doesn't clear confusion, you could PM me telling why you think it's childish, because this is not the "why your emotions are a little bit off" thread
    Pardonnez-moi, mademoiselle, but I never said that you're supposed to "feel good" around someone who loves you -- not a very good indicator of love. Otherwise, how could that person be your best friend to begin with, if she didn't care for you in some way? Surely you began with things such as common interests, and progressed to looking out for each other. She might not make you feel tingly deep down inside, but I'm sure she'd stick by you through thick and thin.

    Nor did I say that human love must be perfect. I never said that, and I don't think we or anything we ever do will be perfect. However, to excel at something... now that's something humans can do.

    And although your ex doesn't love you back, it is completely possible for you to love him. I didn't say that love must be exchanged for it to be love. Rather, it can be one-sided; that's what most people call "unrequited love".

    Now here's something both you and I can agree on. Whenever you do scold your beau, you do so because you genuinely care for him, amirite? And when you do ignore him or mistreat him at times, mistakes such as those don't change the fact that you do love him, provided that you do love him.. Mistakes like those show that we're all imperfect, but they don't disprove the fact that you are very much capable of loving... or even excelling at it.

    So there. You've given me so much to think about today... Thanks.

    So much for our little aside into "obsession" and "love"... And back to the really bad stuff. If someone's willing to go back there, that is. Hehehehehe.
    Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose.

  7. #103
    Devoted Otaku Spike'sRose may be famous one day Spike'sRose may be famous one day Spike'sRose's Avatar
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    Re: Rapists

    Thanks everyone, for reading.

    I think the more I can talk about it, the more people I can help.

    I have moved on, though it's a struggle.

    And yes, words actually do help. ^____^

    Yes, some as little as 5. I think that bothered me more than my own rape. The fact that he hurt those little girls.

    I wish more girls/women would come forward, to the authorities, that is.

    For the record, I go to the bar all the time. I don't usually go alone, but if I do, I only have a few beers, and I'm in my regular bar, so everyone knows me. Also, wearing little or no clothes doesn't matter at all. I don't care if a woman is walking around naked, she does NOT deserve to be raped. EVER. Even hookers. If a hooker gets raped, everyone says, "Oh well, it was only a hooker." No, she's a woman first, and a hooker second.

    At the trial for my rape, the defense attorney TRIED to say I was asking for it, because I was "flirting with him." ((Those weren't the exact words the creep used, but that's what he meant.

    Needless to say, the trial didn't even last two days.

    I don't like to really talk about it much.
    I've come to terms with it myself, and that's all that matters for me.

    I may have died that night, but I am been reborn into the strong woman I am today. ((How poetic lol))

    Anyway, thank you all for reading and caring. ^___^

  8. #104
    Otaku cojoe5 is off to a good start
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    Re: Rapists

    This is just what i think so don't take it personaly....If you see a girl getting raped or a guy bothering a girl and he touchs her and she tries to leave and he grabs her I say go kick that stupid motherf***kers a$$ and don't let up until the cops or someone else pulls you off of him (Thats wat i believe would be the right thing to do and i will do it the first time i get a chance because that is just plain unhonorable because when she says no than just give up and shut up because if you keep trying then your just screwing yourself over)
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