Buddhism teaches that we should practice kindness, mercy and forgiveness. Me not being a Zen master, I find it hard to do on occasion--depending on the situation.
Example: I found myself stuck in a situation that I like to think as one of my darker hours. My cousin got me jumped over somethin' I had nothin' to do with. Now, the only reason my cousin got me in to it was because he was tryin' to be cool in front of his retarded gang-bangin' friends. So, I found myself with 16 stitches in my lip and an astronomically large hospital bill because of him. I could've died, according to a few friends who were there (I almost fell of a balcony during the attack). Not to mention that I don't remember most of the incident, due to blacking out. I lost a 15-30 mins of my life that day.
That happened before I got serious about trying to live in peace and practice constant kindness to others, so I was LIVID! My dad, who practically raised my cousin, and I were talkin' about it a few years back and I told him that I would kill my cousin if I seen him. Dad tried to talk me out of it and all I could say in reply was, "Family doesn't set up family for danger/failure!" I had to stay away from family gatherings for two/three years because I was serious about revenge! It was all I could think of for a while.
A couple years go by after my darkest hour and I go to my uncle's b-day party. Guess who's there? Yup, the bastard who could've got me killed. He spent the entire night sayin' sh*t like, "I love you fam!" or, "Are you mad at me, dawg?" I had spent so much time thinking of revenge up until that point. So, instead of ignoring him (which I had for two hours that night), I gave him a piece of my mind. I told him I don't like him. I told him I can't trust him. I also told him I wanted revenge--that I wanted that 30 mins back... But I had changed over those few years and I knew that karma would get to him, so I never made a scene about it; karma got to him anyway. Apparently, he felt guilty about what happened and tried to confront his friends about it. They slit his throat and he was hospitalized. So, me being upset was for naught.
He's my family, I can't hurt him--even if I wanted to. I can't trust him at the same time and for some reason, I can't learn to forgive him. I don't think I want to though, but that's me clinging to an emotion, which is against Zen teachings. Maybe one day, I'll forgive him. But, I can't do it today or any other day in the near future. Family doesn't get family in to that kind of trouble.