I think now that the agents actually see me, that they think am some pretty girl and they think am stupid. Kinda like Paris Hilton I guess, except I'm not that pretty and not that stupid. It is kinda stressing me out. Just because you look good doesn't mean you can't be smart and have a brain. So I have just been trying to show them that am really good at my job.
However, there is this one guy on my team. He is so mean to everyone. He is always telling me, that he knows more than me and he is trying to tell me what to do. LOL Its annoying, because he doesn't know what I'm suppose to be doing, and I am doing my job. Then I go an make fun of him by saying, "Oh, this is part of my job, I guess you didn't get the memo. Gee I wonder why you didn't get it..... Oh wait, it must have been because it's none of your business! Maybe you should get back to work now."
Honestly he doesn't respect me, and he is very difficult to work with. He thinks he knows everything in the short time he has worked in the company, he just thinks he is the beat little agent ever. He is a good agent, I will give him that, however his attitude is horrible to try to work with. Plus, I get the feeling he thinks woman are inferior and doesn't listen to them well.
In short, I'm kinda stressed out a bit. Because people are judging me on my looks, and some people are just really hard to work with.
Maybe I just need to be more hard on them? Or should I just work my hardest to gain their respect. Maybe respect just takes time. Am I horrible manager or what? I find it hard to work with people who are cocky and don't listen.
Should I break him down, and then try to build him back up like the military does people? Or is that too harsh?
Signature is a Gwenibe original.
Those kind of people can't really change their preconceived ideas of people, unless you try an extreme, or work it out in the long run.
What the man COULD be doing is trying to make up for something that he lacks in... no, I'm not talking about the typical joke of sizes, I'm actually talking about that he might not be good at other things - that he's trying to be impressive to himself. What he could be lacking is skills in other things, or possibly even good friends. And whether or not he has those skills now, or friends now, doesn't matter - since he grew himself into that point in his life that he believes that this is the only way to function since it has "gotten him this far".
For that, there are a lot of options... you could do is playfully joke with his ideas and build it to a teasing friendship. ...you could go with his ideas and show him how it fails compared to your usual workings. ...you could shame him in front of others that would count towards his pride in what he does (don't shame him in trivial things, that's just mean), and see if that humbles him, or makes him quit. ^^; ...you could just blankly ignore him and continue your job and see if he "gives up on you" in the following weeks. ...or whatever.
Or another thing he COULD be doing is the typical "men are better than women, I'm better than most men, so you're lower to me than anyone else"... y'know, typical testosterone head.
The best thing you could do is push HIM to HIS limit. He seems to be stressing you out, you retort by stressing HIM out. You push him and push him until... two options. Option 1: Push him to the point where he does something stupid because of his stress - at that point, he might quit, he might get fired, or you can definitely report him. Option 2: Push him to A point where he's nearly had it with you, at that point you leave him alone and he'll gladly leave you alone. //// Another option for that is possibly negotiating what he wants. He may not admit that he wants you gone, so he'll mention something else. You take what he says and you ask him for something in return (something like "stay outta' my business"), you logically work it out so that you both "get what you want" and he'll have no RIGHT to complain.
Or perhaps he's a perfectionist, and with the combination of his idiotic ideas of how you should work - he's doing nothing but annoying you on incorrect assumptions and commands.
For that, you prove him wrong on every assumption he gives. You keep proving him wrong and he'll have to cower away to rethink what to do next, he might change his mind about you, or he might even try to trick you into screwing up. In the last case: Just keep your guard up, don't do anything you don't need to do. He'll falter to the point where he can't redeem himself without renewing himself.
........orrrr........... whatever, actually...
See how it keeps going in the following days and you'll get a better idea of what to do - I'd just list a million things no one would want to do anyways.
Yeah you are pretty much right. The guy is trying to get rid of me, because the only person he respects is our boss. He used to be the go to guy for the team, and now I'm the go to girl. Which he keeps on staring at me and I do not know why. And he told one of my friends that he was going to make my life a living hell, they told his boss. Then his boss had a talk with him. Then I got "I hate you" stares for the rest of the night from that boy.
I have noticed whenever I ignore him he gives up, and whenever I out talk him, he tells me to go away and gives up. Which I think he wants to be in my position and that is why he is trying to give me hell. Because today when I told him your not my boss, he told me "No, I'm not, but I will be." I think tomorrow I'm going to bug him until he breaks, I learned today he is really sensitive about his statistics, so I will start with that.
Signature is a Gwenibe original.
...but I'd rather not be either, a friend is much more helpful than a professional in my opinion. Corny.
But yeah, for now just keep it up - don't let him get to you, that's exactly what he wants. If he does anything noticeably different/effective, then you might have to change your ideas of how to deal with him. But that hasn't come yet, so don't worry about it.
The only way to defeat hate is to exhaust it first.
some people (especially people like the agent you described) just wont respect you no matter what. I would think that when he tries to boss you around, just ignore the hell out of him, hes in his own little world and he doesnt want to be taken out of it.
I think you should show him whos boss dont fire him but be tough on him and tell him to stop underminding you or you will fire him so give him a warning and tell him to stop doing it if he doesn't then fire him.