Thread: .::100 Days with my Kawaii Boy::. Fanfix

So...

We ran like crazy, with his fan club chasing after him.

"My chest hurts! I don't want to run anymore!" I whined, grabbing onto my chest as I took heavy breathes to calm my aching chest.

Taka, ignoring my whines, pulled me into a classroom and closed the door quickly while we heard the screaming fans run pass us.

"Ha.. Ha.. Ha..."(my heavy breathing)

Sitting down, I rested my head onto the wall and grabbed hold of my shoulder.
"Your not in fit, are you?" Taka asked, slightly breathing heavily as he collapsed next to me.

"Shut. Up.. I. Don't. Have. Room. In. My. Schedule. To. Have. Gym. Anymore. -O-" Muttering beneath my heavily breath.

After a while, our breathing became normal and we just sat in the empty classroom, silently.

"Sorry, I never caught your name." He finally said.

"Because I never said it."

"..."

"..."

"What is it?"

"What is what?" I said, looking at my knees.

"Your name!"

"..."

"Stop playing-"

"Yuki Ayeka." I got up, brushing off the dirt off my skirt and walked over to the door. "Keep the ten dollars, okay? I'm not in the mood of running around like today just because I owed you a lunch." I said.

It was silent and I was about to open the door when he said "Shinomori Taka..."
Turning around, he was still sitting at his spot. He looked up at me and I avoided his gaze. "Isn't it polite to ask the other person for their name?"

"..."

"I can't believe a crappy attitude like yours got a pretty name like that." He said, getting up, brushing off his pants and walked over to the door.

"Heh, whatever." I was about to leave again before he said...

"They might be still out there. If you go out from this room and someone saw you, they might call you a slut."

"..."

"Just stay in here for a little bit longer."

"Do you want something?" I looked up at him, putting on my emotionless expression on my face to hide my anger. KYAH! I had an okay reputation, no one spread rumors about me before!!

"Yeah... I do."

"Hurry up and tell me then!"

"I want... you to be my girlfriend. ^--^"

...

Is my ears clogged up? I put my pinky to my ear, making sure it’s clean. "Sorry, I think my mind was wandering off when you told me what you want. What do you want?"

He smiled softly (for the first time!) and placed his hand onto my head, messing up my hair. "Your my girlfriend, okay?" He asked and opened the door.

"Wth... Why should I?! There is A LOT more girls who are willing to throw themselves at your feet! Can't I set you up with one of them?! >O<" I shouted before he left the classroom.

It was silent and finally we heard the bell.

"Because those girls are scary... -O- You know how scary girls are like that? Jeez... Anyhow, it's just until they leave me alone."

"FuQ... Find someone else."

"Nahhh." He smiled, turning around. "I don't see you as a girl."

WHAT?! FuQ.. Your gonna die!

"So I wouldn't grow feelings for you. Obviously you hate my guts- look on the bright side. As a "boyfriend" I will have to put up with all your whining and s***."

To be honest... That actually sounds good... I can make him carry my books for me! HAHA, you will live to regret this, you lil bast*** But... That’s not good enough T^T

"Wait- that’s not enough! It only benefits you, I want something more!"

He looked at me and then fell into a deep thought. "A kiss a day?"

W-W-W-WHAT?!

"WHY WOULD I-"

Before I could shout, he placed his hand behind my head and...

...

...

...

KISSED ME@$@$^$#!!!

I pushed him away, glaring at him.

"YOU WANNA DIE?! I"LL BURY YOU ALIVE TODAY! >//< " I reached and grabbed his neck, strangling him as I shook him hard.

"YUKI AYEKA! "

Oh s***...

Turning around.. I noticed a teacher glaring at me along with some of my schoolmates.

"T-T-Teacher... I can explain... He was sexually abusing me so I was simply trying to defend myself" T^T She doesn't look convinced... And I'm telling the truth!

"Yeah right..."

"What a slut- I bet she got mad cuz he turned her down."

"Omg... Poor Taka-sama."

"SILENT!" The teacher shouted, her face bright red.

Why.. Why do I look like the bad guy here?! This isn't suppose to be happening!
"Teacher, it's my fault."

Did... Did Taka admit his wrong?! HA!

"You see, today is Ayeka-chan's and my 100th day so I took her here to have some privacy- since we been going out secretly and well.. I trip and grabbed her at a personal spot. "

O//O WHAT?! NOOOO!

"Teacher, no no, its a lie! I'm not going out with him!"

"Then what were you two doing in here? "

"He made me come in here!"

The teacher looked at me. "Don't make Shinomori-san sound nasty. His a very good boy."

She... She took his side?! Is he under every girls favorite?!

"Shinomori-san, please be careful next time. Now we are ten minutes late in class, you two return to class."

Ha... ha...

I felt HIM taking my wrist and pulled me along with him. Once we turned the corners of the hall, he told me in a whisper. "Today is our first day ^--^ Since I kissed you, I will take responsibility of you."
"...."
"Ayeka-chan?"
"^%^*&*(&!! What do you want?!"

Glaring at him, angrily, he just simply smiled and said "I always get what I want."
Huh....?? Rae you telling me your a spoil brat?

He turned away. "I'll see you after school! So you better meet me in the front gate or I'll K I L L YOU!" He shouted and walked away...

Bah... Goodbye peaceful life and your not welcome in annoying life...



So??? What do you think?? Heheh, yeah, I know my grammar is bad!!! So yeah.. besides that, any comments??

Okaayyyyy... I written Chapter two ^--^ I'm kind of lost with what my idea was sooo yeah, haha, anyhow!! Also after a lot debating with myself, I decided to change the main character's name, Ayeka, to Ayame, it's original name. I dunno... Ayeka doesn't sound right for her -- --" Anywayz, Enjoyz ^^;;

.::100 Days with my Kawaii Boy::.- Chapter Two

"Omg! Seriously?!"

"SHH!" I covered Yumi's moved quickly, glancing side to side.

Students stared us like o_O and turned away, reading their books.

I'm in the library...

The only place I swear a guy like Taka would never go into. Because...

I think he doesn't have enough brain cells to read any of these books-- --"

Yumi covered her mouth, looking around to see if anyone overheard us yet. "Hehe, sorry but Taka-kun. THE Taka-kun?! Kyah,,, I would love to go out with him >//<" Hearts came out of her eyes.

T^T

"What should I do? Do you know how annoying it will be to stick with him for 100 days?!"

"You want to give him to me? I'll take him ^--^"

Bah... I'm ashamed T^T your thinking about being with Taka rather then trying to comfort your friend.

"Did you notice that he was your first kisser?"

O_O

He was? no....

O_O

it was...

O_O

O//O

>////<

"KYAHHHHH!!!" OMG, OMG! He WAS!

o_O<= everyone who's staring

"Ay-"

"I CANT BELIEVE MY LIPS GOT CONTAMINATED BY HIM!! ^$*$*^&*)&%$^!!!! THAT BAST*** WILL DIE TODAY!!!"

Yumi called but I left the library.

Tada, tada, tada <= me running.

You bast***!!! YOU WILL DIE IN MY HANDS!!!! >_<

Tada, tada...

"AYAME-CHANNN! WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!" Stopping abruptly, I turned around and faced....

Yoshi-kun T^T

He asked me out a LOT of times and me...

Well... Isn't it obvious?! I turn him down -O-

"H-H-Hi Yoshi-kun ^--^" <= breathing hard.

"Where are you going? Isn't you class studying in the library? ^--^"

Yoshi-kun... sometimes you scare me -- --" please don't tell me you been stalking me. "Haha... Yeah, well, I'm looking for Shinomori Taka."

"Oh... I see ^--^"

He looked kind of... disappointed...

Sorry >O<

"I gotta go! Bye bye!" I waved and hurried off. I have to get to his class! I have to K I L L him!
"AYAME-CHAN! Isn't his class over there?!" Turning around, I saw Yoshi point to the opposite side of the hall -- --;;

NO! His class is at-

...

....

......!!

Crap... I don't know -- --"


"OUCH OUCH!"

PUK PUK!

"STOP THAT!"

PUK PUK PUK!

"AYAME-CHANNNN!" Taka whined.

Hehe, I, a very smart student, found an excuse to call Taka out to the back door. I, a very smart student, prepared for his punishment ^O^ Today you will die horribly!

"You fuQin loser! How dare you kiss me!" I screamed, punching him more. Hehe, Yoko taught me self defence -0- these skills are very useful. Although it may seem easy but they're not so kids- don't try this at home -0-

"AND YOU JUST REALIZED THAT NOW?! Omg... THAT WAS TWO HOURS AGO! You’re so freaking slow!"

PUK!

"Hey! I have a bruise there!"

Finally.. Out of strength, I fell onto my ass and...

"WAHHHHH!" I cried.

O_O

Heuk.. Heuk..."WAHHH!"

"Ah.. Calm down, don't cry. Shh! You can hit me, stop crying! People are gonna think I made you cry!"

Che.. You did you little bast***!

He took my face and wiped my tears with his blazers sleeves.

How romantic -- --

"Now tell your husband what's wrong ^O^"

Hubby... Omg.. my poor ears, hearing such words from your scary voice --- ---;; "You will go to hell! And will BURNNNNNN until your a crispy chicken >O<"

"... Haha... Aww, you care about me that much that you cried about it?"

"NO! You stole my f-f-f-first kiss! EW! I'm crying because you contaminated my innocent lips!"
"I gave you your first kiss?!"

"..."

“Puwah…”

“… Don’t even dare to start-”

"HAHA!"

"... Shut up T^T"

"HAHAHAH!"

"..."

"Haha! Sorry but... HAHAH! Your kidding right? I'm your first kisser! HAHAH!"

I don't find it so humorous -- -- you @$$hole... I hope Satan pokes you on the ass with his fork T^T

Finally... He stopped and patted my head. "So I'm gonna take responsibility over you ^O^"
"... Do you still need your hand? I'll rip it off if you don’t remove it off my head!"

He smiled and moved his hand to...
MY WAIST!

And pulled me closer...

Omg... Mommy!!! Your innocent child is being contaminated again!

"Is this better ^--^" He was so close, I could feel his body lending against mine.

"Let go of me >_< What the hell are you doing?! I'll punch you until you die!!"

"Heh ^--^ I think you need another kiss!" He smiled and lend closer...

I tried to push him away but it didn't work. WHY IS HE SO STRONG?!

So I tried to kick him in the nuts!!! >__<

But he got me in a position where I cant.

No... No... I don't want to get kissed by a monster poo like you... T^T

So I did the only thing that I could think of doing...

"RAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!"



"^--^" He smiled and came out of the office.

I was waiting for him- not because I was scared that the teachers would hit him... But to see if he was beaten enough. Clearly... He wasn't....

THERE WASN'T A SCRATCH ON HIM!!

"Ayame-chan, you were waiting for your husband >O< aww! For a moment there, I thought you started to dislike me ><"

"-- --;; Did the teacher hit you hard?"

(- -- )(-- --)( -- -)(-- --)(- -- ) ^__^

"... Are you superman or something?? Doesn't the teachers beaten hurt?"

"**** teacher understood that it was all a BIG misunderstanding! Hehe, aren't you proud of your husband? He knows how to get out of troubles ^--^"

Whoever who controls fate... Why do you insist on torturing me?!

"Yeah -- --"

"Oh yeah, I have to go somewhere after school today, so don't call or try to meet up with me okay? Sorry I have to do this on our first day >O<"

"I'm sorry too." Kyahhh! THANK-YOU GOOOODDDD!!! ^O^

"I'll call you later!" He quickly hugged me and ran off back to class.

Eww... I was hugged by him -- -- Ah... I should go back to class now too >O<
"Your... You’re going out with Taka-san... Aren't you?"

Hoe...?? Turning around...

Two big black eyes stared at me...

...Filled with hurt.

"Ah...Its not what it seems…" Crap... I feel guilty suddenly....T^T Damn you Taka…

It's some good stuff, but I have a couple of suggestions.

1) Get rid of the "netspeak." People don't talk with emoticons in real life, so they shouldn't be infesting your story. You're writing a story, not composing an IM to your best friend. If someone is happy, you should illustrate that within the story's action and dialog, not with a ^_^ emoticon.

2) Bear with me on this one, it's one of my biggest pet peeves with web-published fiction. You've got lots of potentially great diolog, but where's the scenery? The story is a bare skeleton of dialog but there is no flesh to give the story life. Develop your characters, give them life. I know you've got a barrel of great ideas to include in the story, but they will mean nothing if it's not been set up with any skill.

Keep plugging away!

Thx for your suggestions ^--^ I appreciate it a lot ^--^ Usually I don't write stories like this, its more complex- like says about the scenery and characters looks but recently I been reading a lot of stories with the "netspeaking" so I'm just trying it out for this story ^--^

I would, if I knew how... close this thread so um, hehe >_< can someone tell me??

Only staff can close a thread. And since you want it closed, I will be happy to comply with your request.