Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast
Results 17 to 24 of 35

Thread: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

  1. #17
    Otaku FallenAngel may be famous one day FallenAngel may be famous one day FallenAngel's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    New York City
    Posts
    306
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    i am for ass whooping, i think more children should be taught manners and if they do somethign wrong or if you told them to not do somethign and they are being a brat, you hit them upside their head to make their skull ache. i am not talkign about hitting them with a bat, but your palm woudl do just fine. i turned out ot have excellent manners, of course a broken mind, a sick and twisted mind and i was phsycologically damaged by my parents... by hey i am an outstanding member of society thanks to my father's army trainign tourture and punishement.
    have yo uever stood on dried peas for seven hours in a corner??? that's what i thought...

  2. #18
    Lady Barronmore Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna has become well known Arrianna's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    3,259
    Thanks
    19
    Thanked 140 Times in 108 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    Make the punishment fit the "crime". It works. They break something, they fix it. They abuse a privilage, they lose it. Consequences work and if you can link the punishent to what they did they remember it longer. Unilateral punishment on the other hand tends to foster rebellion. If the punishment is the same no matter what the kid does what incentive is there to not break the "big" rules instead of just owning up to honest mistakes?

    l Stone Hold l Now We're Cooking! l Thanks to Kaos for the awesome sig!

  3. #19
    Newbie Caz-chan may be famous one day Caz-chan may be famous one day Caz-chan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    In a shed somewhere in Aberdeen
    Posts
    86
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    In the last few years, smacking a child on the bottom has become illegal here in the UK. It basically allows the child to come forward and say their parent abuses them, giving the child more power than the parent.
    This means I shall be raising my child outside of the UK.
    I was raised to believe that if you stepped out of line (purposly defied your parents, were cheeky, rude, swearing, abusive or just nasty) you got a smacked bum for it.
    And I feared it, it taught me how to restrain myself and not allow myself to become rude or nasty to my elders. This carried on into later life where being taught manners and how to articulate myself in social situations, I grew to understand my surroundings and appreciate each event. It cannot be me, me, me in every situation and I came to realise this.

    I dont believe in 'time out' as it teaches the child nothing. If they misbehave, they get placed alone for a while. When you are almost an only child (my sister was absent for most of my developmental stages as she is 10 years older than me and when I started to get a bit out of hand she was living away at Uni and she hated lil brat me anyway XD ) you are used to that, so I felt I learned nothing from them. You get grounded for a bit, no big deal.

    My mother is a typical Scottish mother - they scream, roar and then let rip on your backside. But this was common knowledge, all the kids I grew up with FEARED getting their asses tanned.

    I see mothers these days who ignore their kids as they tear apart the shop I work in, having tantrums when they dont get what they want and demand such things from their parents as if it were their right.
    If that had been me, I would have been marched out of the shop and smaked infront of everyone.
    The combination of the smacking and everyone seeing stopped you doing it.
    I dont agree in hitting them anywhere else like in the head or body, those parts arent heavily fleshed and they can do serious damage. The bottom is fleshy and wont do damage unless real fource is used but I know I wouldnt do that, smacking is a stinger and humiliation of knowing you have been caught out doing something bad. Children do not like to be wrong and hate to be proved wrong, but by doing this is issues them with their warrent - you did wrong and this is what happens when you do.

    If my kids ever step out of line they will have a sore bum!

  4. #20
    Otaku erosennin may be famous one day erosennin may be famous one day erosennin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Redmond
    Posts
    157
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    I'd say good overall parenting, not just the disciplinary aspect, is more a key to success. I'm not a parent, so I can really only talk about my experiences with discipline as a child, but my dad mixed it up between physical and mental punishment for my actions. That really helped shape me. My mother, on the other hand, went at me with a long, wooden spoon, which really only made me afraid of the spoon.

    On the other hand, there's bad parenting and going overboard, which I have also experienced. I have some fond memories as a small child, being so relieved that my dad wasn't going to punish me (because I knew by that point he was perfectly capable), still loved me, and that was enough to steer me clear most of the time. I am also haunted by the fact that he damn near killed me in rage over a broken calculator when I was fourteen; a memory I sometimes slip back into like a post-trauma victim, remembering my sister screaming at him to stop like the wave pattern is seared onto my eardrums.

    I'd say the 'ass whuppin', at least in the terms I think of it as, probably isn't appropriate for most circumstances much as letting the child know that you're disappointed. Just have to remember, that kid loves you and cares about what you think of them. Do it right and they'll remember it fondly, do it wrong and you've seriously f'ed them up.

  5. #21
    Otaku Kiri79 may be famous one day Kiri79 may be famous one day Kiri79's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Konohagakure
    Posts
    459
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    To me, you would get abusive if you hit your children constantly for idiotic reasons.

  6. #22
    Newbie shonenguy01 may be famous one day shonenguy01 may be famous one day shonenguy01's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    minnesota
    Posts
    18
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    Quote Originally Posted by Kiri79
    To me, you would get abusive if you hit your children constantly for idiotic reasons.

    I agree i've seen that in allot of families i know

    disipline is okay, but not out of anger
    Shonen Guy

  7. #23
    Legendary Otaku Snake Champion, Zelda Champion, Crazy Koala Champion, Minigolf Champion, Concentrate Champion, Guess 5 Champion, Batting Champ Champion, Beach Ball Control Champion, Bookworm Champion, Wacky Word Wiz Champion, Fight Fight 3 Champion, Spinner's Luck Champion, Traffic Jam Champion, Yeti Pengu Throw Champion Legend is making a name for themselves Legend is making a name for themselves Legend is making a name for themselves Legend's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Sharks Territory
    Posts
    4,762
    Thanks
    64
    Thanked 67 Times in 61 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    I never got spanked or canned, but got the HK's styles ruler on the hand. My parents had a good system. It was first talk, then smack. If the first time you don't listen then there's another talk, finally you get the ruler. But I believe kids need discipline both in fear and physical discipline. Because I mean that's how primitive learn when they first invented fire and touched it. Kids are like a blank piece of paper.

    'Cause you give me something / That makes me scared, alright / This could be nothing / But I'm willing to give it a try / Please give me something
    'Cause someday I might call you from my heart

  8. #24
    AO Angel ^^ angelan may be famous one day angelan may be famous one day angelan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Toronto
    Posts
    296
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Re: Which do you think is better? (child discipline)

    QueenOfGames, sorta what i was looking for.

    I follow along the same lines. Hitting the kid once or twice to let them know that they shouldn't be doing what they're doing (after having tried other methods) is okay for me. However, if it obviously doesn't work...don't keep smacking the kid. What I don't like is...the parents start getting used to just smacking the kid and as the kid gets used to getting smacked, they just keep smacking them more. There's a point where it just doesn't work any more.

    Hearing what my parents said about hitting me as a kid, honestly, I can see myself as one of those definant kids who would just leave the anger pent up from subsequent beatings until I blew up in a fit. If a kid doesn't give the right reaction after hitting them, that's a good sign that hitting is not the way to teaching that kid. The decision to hit or not to hit should be dependent on the child and how he/she (genuinely) reacts and not a simple: "yeah my kid's gonna get a beating if he steps outta line".
    -=|AnimeReflections|Live-Evil|My Trades|=-

    Put your unused CPU to use for a good cause: |Folding@Home||Human Proteome Folding|

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts