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Thread: drunk(p)

  1. #1
    Newbie simple may be famous one day simple may be famous one day simple's Avatar
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    drunk(p)

    Im your demon,
    I am hell,
    Come Closer,
    I'll show you Light,
    Bring your Life,
    So i can shine,
    Be my sky,
    And i will Fly,
    Feel no Pain,
    Brings me Shame,
    In the Shadows,
    Is where i Hide,


    -simple


    -------------------------------------------------please
    -----------------------------------------comments
    -------------------------will
    ----------be
    ----aprecriated
    -thank you,
    Last edited by simple; May 31, 2005 at 12:14 AM.

  2. #2
    new piks in mem gallery animechick may be famous one day animechick may be famous one day animechick's Avatar
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    Arrow

    ohhhhh baby- makes you sound evil, but in one of those'i want to know more' sences..........very interesting and well writen!!

    *get back online!!!*
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  3. #3
    tak
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    Otaku tak may be famous one day tak may be famous one day
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    the name sounds funny by way kool peom

  4. #4
    Newbie Aya Makatokki may be famous one day Aya Makatokki may be famous one day Aya Makatokki's Avatar
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    Well, its a nice poem none the less, but I have a question. Did you mean for some lines to rhyme and others not? That's the only thing that I saw wrong : )

  5. #5
    of the AMC Innerhell may be famous one day Innerhell may be famous one day Innerhell's Avatar
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    not all poems have to rhyme
    some have patterns like the number of syllables or the sounds of certain words
    some are simply free verse
    when it comes to true poetry, you don't restrict your work on the rules of others
    you make your own and you give birth to it with your heart and your soul

    anyway... my ranting set aside...

    that was a nice poem
    I liked it

    [-_-] Ih
    I love my girlfriend.

  6. #6
    Newbie Aya Makatokki may be famous one day Aya Makatokki may be famous one day Aya Makatokki's Avatar
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    I'm not saying that all poems had to rhyme, I was just pointing out that he had some verses rhyming and others not. That's not a common pattern for poetry : )
    Last edited by Aya Makatokki; Jun 02, 2005 at 06:25 PM. Reason: Spelling Error

  7. #7
    You's Trollin Pro Leafblower Champion, Helicopter Champion ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro's Avatar
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    kool poem dude, it is awesome i like the part that says "Im your demon,
    I am hell"keep it up man!!!

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