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Thread: little b*tch (poem)

  1. May 25, 2005 11:55 AM #1
    deaths_raver667
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    little b*tch (poem)

    ok this poem was gonna be adapted into the chorus for a heavy metal song i was wrriting but i didn't do it.

    stal souls from the scyth,
    strive,
    writhe,
    go insane,
    take joy in the pain,
    kill kill death defire,
    kill kill little vampire!
    i am the urban monky
    look to the mune
  2. May 25, 2005 11:58 AM #2
    ketaro
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    kool poem(i believe) dude!!<^^>
  3. May 27, 2005 06:17 PM #3
    animechick
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    Arrow

    sound to me liek a slipknot chorus- hehe-good one thpught ppain and death-wat i love!!
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  4. May 27, 2005 06:29 PM #4
    Zui Quan
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    Quote Originally Posted by deaths_raver667
    kill kill death defire,

    "defire" isn't a word, I'm assuming you meant "defier?"

    Also, line 5 needs another syllable for the meter to make sense. I'd recommend a change to "taking joy in the pain."
    Last edited by Zui Quan; May 27, 2005 at 06:32 PM.
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  5. May 28, 2005 07:59 AM #5
    deaths_raver667
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zui Quan
    "defire" isn't a word, I'm assuming you meant "defier?"

    Also, line 5 needs another syllable for the meter to make sense. I'd recommend a change to "taking joy in the pain."
    yes i did mean defier, sorry i can't type to save my life, i decided on line five being what it is as it is supposed to be screamed more than anything and i though that this worked better.
    i am the urban monky
    look to the mune
  6. May 30, 2005 09:41 AM #6
    tak
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    hahahaha kool song
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