Thread: Sex....Before or After?

I think sex with people you love is fine. Marriage is good but if you love someone not being married shouldn't stop you from having sex if you both want to. I see marriage as more of a contract rather than a symbol of love, but thats just me, for other people its sacrid which is cool.

I think waiting until marriage is the best because no good can come from it. There are too many negative outcomes. Besides no one really looks at how messy it can get.

how delightfully Christian this sounds ~ using marriage as an excuse to appease the lust-filled nature of humans, unawares that either path (marriage or not..) is a roulette gamble for health, sanity & whispery dreams of love...what are the odds of winning any of these in this day & age, i wonder..

I think you have a very naive way of looking at sex. What you have commented above just isnt realistic for most people. I thought the same way way back when and it just didnt turn out the way I thought it would. I think waiting very much is based on a religious aspect. I do think people can do it and good for them if they do, but its not that big of a deal in many respects and in many it is. You just have to weigh your options. I'm not condoning sex before marriage nor am I against it, I think it is what it is. And also dont get me wrong if you go around sleeping with everyone you can you deserve what you get, but if you truely care for someone and it happens before you are married, it happened and hopefully it was everything you ever wanted. I guess I'm a bad guy if we base my experience off of your opinions, but I dont feel like a bad guy, I dont have any STDs, and I still am not swayed by the whole marriage thing. I am however careful, I wouldnt do anything with someone I didnt absolute trust and know like a close friend.

Well, if I were to take this from a religious standpoint, most religions encourage no sex before marriage. I disagree, personally. The "no sex before marriage" rule usually results in a lot of married teenagers who marry early to have sex faster. That's why so many people in the Utah bubble get married at age 19.

Originally Posted by Delerium

I think you have a very naive way of looking at sex. What you have commented above just isnt realistic for most people. I thought the same way way back when and it just didnt turn out the way I thought it would. I think waiting very much is based on a religious aspect. I do think people can do it and good for them if they do, but its not that big of a deal in many respects and in many it is. You just have to weigh your options. I'm not condoning sex before marriage nor am I against it, I think it is what it is. And also dont get me wrong if you go around sleeping with everyone you can you deserve what you get, but if you truely care for someone and it happens before you are married, it happened and hopefully it was everything you ever wanted. I guess I'm a bad guy if we base my experience off of your opinions, but I dont feel like a bad guy, I dont have any STDs, and I still am not swayed by the whole marriage thing. I am however careful, I wouldnt do anything with someone I didnt absolute trust and know like a close friend.

I was going to say the exact same thing until I read this post. Well put.

Originally Posted by Eriadd

Well, if I were to take this from a religious standpoint, most religions encourage no sex before marriage. I disagree, personally. The "no sex before marriage" rule usually results in a lot of married teenagers who marry early to have sex faster. That's why so many people in the Utah bubble get married at age 19.

I don't know if that is statistically proven, but hell I think it can be proven just from observation. One family of my cousins is very religious and all their kids were married by the time they were 18 or 19. My sisters ex boyfriend who was overly religious ended up marrying right out of highschool. And I know of several other people who were religious that got married right out of highschool as well. I mean all the best to them, but it just seemed odd that they would find someone and then 6 months later run to the alter like they were in a rush for something they weren't ready for. And hey even the ultra family friendly semi religious show 7th Heaven brought up the idea that people who wait to have sex till they are married may get married earlier because they want to have sex.

I don't know about that or care, just making an observation.

As for my opinion, Sex has nothing to do with my moral beliefs or values, because I don't view it as immoral. It's just an activity like exercising, something you do when you're bored or want to have some fun and it just so happens you can share it with someone else. But like any activity it can be dangerous if the right precautions aren't taken, but there is a danger for most everything. I don't see marriage as a means of finally being able to experience that act. If someone wants to wait fine, it's their choice, but if someone doesn't want to, it's fine that is their choice.

I don't even see why people put such an emphasis on it. It's not that big of a deal. In highschool people treated it like this shocking taboo "Gasp oh my god, so and so had sex"
Maybe it's because I'm an adult now (Well only according to my age) and it just seems less of a deal that it did back then.