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Thread: Anywhere (Poem)

  1. #1
    Otaku White_Mage88 may be famous one day White_Mage88 may be famous one day
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    Anywhere (Poem)

    I just wrote this one, and I'm about half asleep so I hope it turns out okay. I'm glad I've been able to write poetry again lately I just hadn't been able to write a single thing. Well anyway lol tell me what you think about this one.

    Just a place
    Anywhere at all…
    To feel safe and warm
    A place to call my own

    Anywhere but here
    Where slowly the days go by
    Anywhere but here
    Where I’m quickly falling apart

    Just want to close my eyes
    Don’t want to hear it anymore
    Like a wounded child
    I just want to let the tears flow

    Can’t get myself away from here
    No amount of running
    Would bring me far enough away
    No amount of driving
    Could make me feel okay

    Want to leave it all behind
    Anywhere but here
    Where it never stops
    Anywhere but here
    Where I can hear the rain drop

    Please take me away from here
    As far as we can go
    I need to escape
    I need to get away from here
    Away from the pain and the lies
    Just take me away

  2. #2
    Otaku royal cutie pain may be famous one day royal cutie pain may be famous one day royal cutie pain's Avatar
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    Re: Anywhere (Poem)

    *is shocked* interesting i love ur style and i felt ur pain just people leaving me alone 4 just one sec


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    Otaku White_Mage88 may be famous one day White_Mage88 may be famous one day
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    Re: Anywhere (Poem)

    Thanks for your comment royal cutie pain. I'm glad you liked it.

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    S.E.L - sexy etna lover Baal may be famous one day Baal may be famous one day Baal's Avatar
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    Re: Anywhere (Poem)

    hmph (concentrate)
    can belive it but is really nice....
    keep it up



    perdoname michelle!

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    Otaku eleonne has disabled reputation eleonne's Avatar
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    Re: Anywhere (Poem)

    I like what you wrote, White_Mage88. The theme is portrayed well and direct to the point, not wandering away from the main theme. I felt the intensity of the persona here and the emotions that persona is struggling with, and I think it is because of your well-chosen words and well-thought out lines and verses. The rhythm adds to the smooth flow - I read it only once but the thoughts of the poem was understood and felt at once. It didn't require for me to repeat reading a particular line as I read the whole poem for the first time - the flow was very natural ^-^ I think that element is imprtant in poems, it should flow smoothly like a song. Nice job! And I did find the theme and the title attractive/appealing ^^ Titles are very important - it should be the first eye-catcher, hehe.

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