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Thread: Attentions

  1. #1
    ~always by your side~ Radarix Champion, Virus 2 Champion, Virus 3 Champion fireandice is off to a good start fireandice's Avatar
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    Attentions

    This was a result of a challenge made to me. I swear, one of these days a challenge is going to be my undoing.lol Well I hope it's atleast a good read for everyone.



    All alone in my room, all I can do is think of you.
    I toss and turn but find no relief in sight.
    How can just thoughts of you make me ache so?
    Words, images, and scenes play out in my mind.

    Muscles tighten, the ache only intensifies.
    I close my eyes and drift away,
    In my own world now I hear you voice.
    I feel your hands on me and gasp.

    I want you and only you.
    Your touch can make me scream your name.
    You speak the words I want to hear,
    Do all the things I want you to do.

    Breathing shallow, heartbeats rapid,
    Feelings spiral out of control.
    Your name cried out from my lips.
    The dreams state around me slowly fades away.

    Thoughts return to normal, loneliness awaits.
    A smile still crosses my face, I have you
    If only in my mind……I wonder
    If I asked for your attentions, would you grant them?

  2. #2
    Sorrow's Angel Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel's Avatar
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    Re: Attentions

    Omg!! I'm speachless!!! I soooooo love this Fai, it's amazing!! Your choice of words brung forth a wonderful picture 2 me. I could see it all play before my eyes as I read this. Once again this is amazing Fai!! ^___^
    Made by- Ryomakurosaki (Thank you sooooo much!!) ^__^

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    fireandice (Jan 31, 2008)

  4. #3
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Attentions

    this poem is streiight from the hear i like that
    and love reallyis complicated and to vie for the attention
    of the one you love can be hard but if love is really in the works
    things wllgo your way.

    i likethis poemand how it shows that attention
    makes the heart feelmoreloved than any actions will almost.
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

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    fireandice (Jan 31, 2008)

  6. #4
    amelissa55 is off to a good start
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    Angry Re: Attentions

    Quote Originally Posted by fireandice View Post
    This was a result of a challenge made to me. I swear, one of these days a challenge is going to be my undoing.lol Well I hope it's atleast a good read for everyone.



    All alone in my room, all I can do is think of you.
    I toss and turn but find no relief in sight.
    How can just thoughts of you make me ache so?
    Words, images, and scenes play out in my mind.

    Muscles tighten, the ache only intensifies.
    I close my eyes and drift away,
    In my own world now I hear you voice.
    I feel your hands on me and gasp.

    I want you and only you.
    Your touch can make me scream your name.
    You speak the words I want to hear,
    Do all the things I want you to do.

    Breathing shallow, heartbeats rapid,
    Feelings spiral out of control.
    Your name cried out from my lips.
    The dreams state around me slowly fades away.

    Thoughts return to normal, loneliness awaits.
    A smile still crosses my face, I have you
    If only in my mind……I wonder
    If I asked for your attentions, would you grant them?

    Hey!!thats from a book!!i've read it!!its called "Scribbler of Dreams"!!

  7. #5
    Newbie Kuinta is off to a good start
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    Re: Attentions

    It's great how much it shows how someone is so devoted towards another person they love. I can definitely imagine the descriptions portrayed. I think this poem has a lot of potential.

  8. #6
    Devoted Otaku bratling may be famous one day bratling's Avatar
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    Re: Attentions

    I swear I need to remember to read more of your work. Because I really love it. Your wording is usually simple but elegant and the story/feelings you provoke give me a smile. Not to mention you make me empathize and remember feeling a lot of the things mentioned in your works. Keep it up buddy!

    You never really loved me/You never really cared/It was all just a game to boost your ego/Those feelings never really there/ I'm filing emotional bankruptcy/My heart can take no more debt/Theres no more "money" there to spend. === Besides tee hee SHE loves me!

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