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Thread: Autumn

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    Newbie Japxican may be famous one day Japxican may be famous one day Japxican's Avatar
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    Autumn

    Idly do the leaves fall
    upon the cold, wet ground.
    They float and die in bitter waste
    without so much as a sound.

    Eventually, the air grows chill
    and frost does bite all things.
    Breath thus falls short and cloudy
    and things begin shivering.

    Rain brings little hope of life
    along the coast’s windy shore.
    ‘Tis frozen in the early morning
    and numbs the earth sore.

    ‘Tis a dying season at hand
    upon the waning year.
    Reminds mankind in beauty and sickness
    that winter is nearly here.

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    Banned beast may be famous one day beast may be famous one day beast's Avatar
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    Re: Autumn

    I like the use of contrast betweeen the start of the season and the end of the season. We are almost liking it in the first stanza but are reminded it is the bringer of winter. It leaves us feeling bitter. I also thought that it was clever you used four stanzas as there are four seasons. I don't know if they are actually thought of that or it was an accident but you know either way good job.

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    Otaku Basketball Champion Shippo101 has disabled reputation Shippo101's Avatar
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    Re: Autumn

    Quote Originally Posted by Japxican View Post
    ‘Tis a dying season at hand
    upon the waning year.
    Reminds mankind in beauty and sickness
    that winter is nearly here.
    I cant explain it but i really love this one here.

    You ended it wonderfully. I really agree with beast
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