Battle magic

-=Broken^Halo=- · Sep 10, 2006, 12:19 PM

Sorcerers and shamans, weave your spells of war,
Ensure our mighty sword-arms are the strongest and the quickest.
Entwine us with great battle magic 'til we stand knee-deep in gore,
And by all the gods, we'll ride to where the fray rages the thickest!

*Kasai* · Sep 10, 2006, 05:43 PM

I really liked the idea behind this poem. Short but filled with imagery. I think the wording could be worked on.

*Baal* · Sep 10, 2006, 05:55 PM

not evryone has perfect grammar ye know?
but still it has long lines that makes the poem like with 8 lines if u divide em...
its really nice.

*Kasai* · Sep 11, 2006, 02:11 AM

I never said anything about grammar, Ball. I meant wording. As in the way you word things. I know that english isnt your first language. Hell, I'm even learning spanish myself! Estoy practicando mi espanol!

Sep 10, 2006, 12:19 PM	#1 (permalink)
-=Broken^Halo=- Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Texas,USA Posts: 226 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 160	Battle magic Sorcerers and shamans, weave your spells of war, Ensure our mighty sword-arms are the strongest and the quickest. Entwine us with great battle magic 'til we stand knee-deep in gore, And by all the gods, we'll ride to where the fray rages the thickest! __________________ Fr3aK~0f~N@Tu\|23
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Sep 10, 2006, 05:43 PM	#2 (permalink)
Kasai Domme Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 2,745 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 1,380	Re: Battle magic I really liked the idea behind this poem. Short but filled with imagery. I think the wording could be worked on. __________________ Seduced by Flesh
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Sep 10, 2006, 05:55 PM	#3 (permalink)
Baal S.E.L - sexy etna lover Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Mayaguez Posts: 1,066 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 309	Re: Battle magic not evryone has perfect grammar ye know? but still it has long lines that makes the poem like with 8 lines if u divide em... its really nice. __________________ perdoname michelle!
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Sep 11, 2006, 02:11 AM	#4 (permalink)
Kasai Domme Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 2,745 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 1,380	Re: Battle magic I never said anything about grammar, Ball. I meant wording. As in the way you word things. I know that english isnt your first language. Hell, I'm even learning spanish myself! Estoy practicando mi espanol! __________________ Seduced by Flesh
Status: Offline

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