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Thread: Belittle me to kill me

  1. #1
    Otaku Basketball Champion Shippo101 has disabled reputation Shippo101's Avatar
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    Belittle me to kill me

    Be little me
    And while you’re at it
    Take my sanity
    Take my soul
    And just kill me
    Tears of pain
    Tears of sorrow
    Are invisible
    Break my smile
    Kick me down
    Break my leg
    Crake my neck
    Just destroy me
    Patronize me
    Hurt me
    Take my innocents
    Snatch my humanity
    Why are you stopping?
    Is there no more to destroy?
    Or are you looking
    Looking for what
    My heart?
    O that left
    When you belittled me
    The simple things hurt me more
    Shippo is determined to become a lvl higher
    I'm a solider of Pen and Paper!
    <3 Atomik_Sprout <3

  2. #2
    Domme Kasai may be famous one day Kasai may be famous one day Kasai's Avatar
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    Re: Belittle me to kill me

    I think to balance it out, you should throw in a long verse. It'd break the beat up a bit.
    Seduced by Flesh


  3. #3
    You's Trollin Pro Leafblower Champion, Helicopter Champion ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro's Avatar
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    Re: Belittle me to kill me

    I think that you need to breake it down in stanzas. It was a nice poem by the way.

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    Re: Belittle me to kill me

    I like the anger in this poem, it really shows what your feeling, other than that breaking it down into stanzas would be nice. This poem is still awesome because you let your feelings do the talking! Nice Job!

  5. #5
    Newbie West_King may be famous one day West_King may be famous one day West_King's Avatar
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    Re: Belittle me to kill me

    This is really good sis you really put your foot in it. You showed how ur heart desapated in the first word they spoke to you and then their looking for empyness, the empty ness they created.

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