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Thread: Birth of the Goddess

  1. #1
    I'm sleepy... Jukebox Hero Champion, Word Up Champion, Word Craze Champion gren may be famous one day gren may be famous one day gren's Avatar
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    Birth of the Goddess

    Birth of the Goddess

    As the world dreams
    beneath the great eyes of Time,
    and man lies in blissful slumber--
    I evolve.

    New flesh burns
    to melt away my old skin,
    and blood pounds
    in my skull
    to awaken her body.

    Locks of raven black
    fall over eyes of amber fire,
    and immaculate light pours
    over and into
    the newly born.

    My former layers,
    my old self,
    are faded and pale
    against the radiant glory
    of a being as perfect as she.

    I will become
    more
    I will accept
    all
    I will be
    and be
    and be
    just to be
    her.

    From my ashes, the Goddess arises.
    sig by Pyro Psycho

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    Banned AngelicDemon201092 is off to a good start AngelicDemon201092's Avatar
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    Re: Birth of the Goddess

    I don't think i've ever read a poem quite like this one.. it's different and yet ........ compelling... in my opinion anyway.. I liked this poem gren and i hope your write some more. ^-^

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    Rawr~ :3 Boxteroid Champion, flyplane Champion, Home Run Champion, Bubbelfutsch Champion, Fire Fighter Champion, Brendans Soccer Champion, Movie Star Match-Up Champion, Total blackout Champion, Text Your Reflexes Champion, Scary movie Champion, Hulk Smash Up Champion, Star Wars Champion, Extreme Snowboarding Champion, Air Disc Champion, Action Fish Champion, A Game Of 3 Halves Champion, Battleball Champion, Hacky Sack Champion, FAD 2003 Champion, SQRL Golf Champion, Dr Yeckyl and Mr Ride Champion, Sky Glide Champion, Flyer Champion, Finnair Champion, Drachenjagd Champion, Canyon Glider Champion, City Surfing Champion, Action Driving Game Champion, Extreme Rowing Champion, Kardahdg Champion, Acceleracers Track Mod Champion, Final Test Champion, Du Wichtel Champion, Pedal Power Champion, Camera Killer 2 Champion, Bike Mania on ICE Champion, ATV Winter Challenge Champion, Caliber Dash Champion, Diesel and Death Champion, Snow Ride Champion, Camera Killer Champion, Pepsi Jet Ski Champion, Bumper Cars Championship Champion, Drifting Champion, Get A Grip Champion, Rooney on the Rampage Champion, Death To Ninja Champion, Kung Fu Hustle 2 Champion, Muay Thai Champion, Metal Arm FAWEGE Champion, Knife Champion, Classroom Fighter Champion, Nobuyuki Forces 3 Champion, Caddeva Champion, Sewer Dweller Champion, Angel Mart Champion, Snowy Champion, Bola Champion, Boiler Room Champion, Bobcat Champion, Amazon Quest Champion, Booty Champion, Five Errors Champion, Mind Your Marbles Champion, Angel Fruit Champion, Binggrae Champion, Candy Shoot Champion, Imperial tiles Champion, Himalayaya - Yeti Strikes Back Champion, Terrorist Attack Champion, Americas Army Champion, Special Operations Champion, Destroy the robots Champion, Cubicle Warfare Champion, Battle Field Champion, Weapons Dealer Champion, Army Copter Champion, Flat War Champion, Terrorist Alert Champion, Bully Basher Champion, Reaktor Champion, Bungee Rescue Champion, The Contraptor Champion, Boris Champion, Carling Cold Champion, Paddleball Champion RayMe is making a name for themselves RayMe is making a name for themselves RayMe's Avatar
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    Re: Birth of the Goddess

    oh yes.. totally agree with you there... compelling... love the descriptions though

    a very good poem there

    "Locks of raven black
    fall over eyes of amber fire,
    and immaculate light pours
    over and into
    the newly born."

    Is it Flocks?
    Last edited by RayMe; Oct 30, 2007 at 07:35 PM. Reason: Use a different font color. Next time its an infraction.

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    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Birth of the Goddess

    Hmmm.... Nice, I like it a lot... It's something quite a lot different from what I've read- unike and that's such a good thing it this pale world ^^

    The thing is that- even though the idea seems quite confusing to me, I kinda understood the poem, the mood, the rhythm and the words themselfe explained the peom and that is something quite great and shows that you are really good with this...

    Anyways, enough of my bla bla, it's a nice work, I really enjoyed reading it and I hope I can read more...

    P.s. Why can't Ray use that font color? O.o

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

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    Re: Birth of the Goddess

    Thanks all. I hold this one close, and glad that you liked it. I like to end on a powerful line, so I hope that my last line accomplished that.

    Quote Originally Posted by RayMe View Post

    "Locks of raven black
    fall over eyes of amber fire,
    and immaculate light pours
    over and into
    the newly born."

    Is it Flocks?
    No, "Locks" as in locks of hair. "Raven black" is a color description.
    sig by Pyro Psycho

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