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Thread: Black Poetry

  1. #1
    Elie Jelly elie26 may be famous one day elie26 may be famous one day elie26's Avatar
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    Black Poetry

    Black Poetry

    Gone were the days of innocent bliss
    You figured those were the ones you truly miss
    To view the world with a child’s eye
    With the privilege of not being afraid to cry

    Cause when everything you say doesn’t matter
    There’s only one known way to feel better
    You turn yourself to the pen and paper
    So that the hurt you feel can come later

    Splattered ink drools across the page
    As every word is written with rage
    The letters you scrawl pierces into holes
    Creating a scar onto the fragile scroll

    Emotions flow till you find yourself numb
    Till you stop hoping salvation would come
    For would time really be the cure?
    As to undo one’s suffering and turn it pure

    Each day passes along with a new emotion
    From anger to hurt and a painful rejection
    Time still passes even if you can no longer feel
    Perhaps that is the only remedy to heal

    When all attachment is lost and gone
    It would be like embracing a new dawn
    No longer bounded, you are set free
    And all that’s left is just black poetry

  2. #2
    RPG Lord and Master/Poet Soldat of life may be famous one day Soldat of life may be famous one day Soldat of life's Avatar
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    Re: Black Poetry

    It rhymes very very well. It clearly explains the process of one who is in deep emotions filled with anger, sadness, regret and a few other things. It seems to follow a clear path in terms of ideas and the message is interesting.

    I personally think this as one of my favorite poems of your repertoire of yours that I can remember of. It seems mature and well thought out. I have difficulty to find a fault in it, which is a good thing XD
    Quote Originally Posted by Soldat of life View Post
    My favorite philosopher:
    Hassun

    Thanks to Xelhes for this amazing work of art ^.^
    Poetry Corner CLICK HERE IF YOU KNOW ME

  3. #3
    Elie Jelly elie26 may be famous one day elie26 may be famous one day elie26's Avatar
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    Re: Black Poetry

    Thank you!
    The title of the poem sorta struck me at one time and all I did was list out a number of stuff that I can relate for the poem. Random words, descriptive, etc. It took me forever to try to edit the 2nd stanza... and after some time I sorta gave up XD So I decided to stick with the original one, I thought it sounded a bit weird(1st and 2nd line). Still, it's one of my rare few works that I'm proud of =X I usually hate them after awhile

  4. #4
    Otaku Hitokiri Battousai may be famous one day Hitokiri Battousai may be famous one day
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    Re: Black Poetry

    your poems always touch me, It feels like I just dont read this poems but I feel them too , cuz it feels like I've already been in those situations or had those feelings, its really Amazing like always , maybe we are very alike, lol, you're the best ^^3 thumbs up


    PS too much "feel"

  5. #5
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    Re: Black Poetry

    My goodness, this was delicious for my mind. Something YOU created. And, I could apply my own meaning, unique to my life. Im sure it means something totaly different to you, and whom ever else reads it. That is what I think great poetry is- When you can apply the words to yourself, and another could read it and see something different to make it apply to them as well.
    ... Not Ever Again...

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