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Thread: Broken Oath

  1. #1
    Newbie whitefoxdemon may be famous one day whitefoxdemon may be famous one day whitefoxdemon's Avatar
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    Broken Oath

    Broken Oath
    The wind blows gently,
    Branches, heavy with white cherry blossoms,
    Sway releasing a cascade of white snow
    The moon out, silent witness to broken oath
    A glitter of steel, a flash of light
    Two masters caught in a deadly dance
    One who swore never to take life again
    Another foresaw the death of his foe
    Both move in the rhythm of the other
    A bolt of lightning , the strike of a snake
    Point struck, puncturing lifeline
    Blood stains the ground crimson
    The earth hungrily soaks it all
    A whisper of final curse
    Brief like the flutter of a struggling bird
    The wind stirs sweeping away the dying breath
    Carrying away the soul of the restless
    To a place unknown, where slain warriors
    Live again on the battle field
    As the master weeps for a broken oath
    a cloud covers the moon
    cloaking the land in darkness

  2. #2
    THUMBSUCKING ADDICTION Mr. K is making a name for themselves Mr. K is making a name for themselves Mr. K's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    I love the nature you put in it. Very cool poem. I do hope to see more.
    ≥°≤ [?] █▓▒░░▒▓█ [?] ≥°≤
    You know how you drown a blonde, Rosalie? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool.
    Jacob Black, Breaking Dawn, Chapter 14, p.271
    Lamie Hynamen "I reject your reality and substitute my own."

  3. #3
    AO's Demon Slayer Hexxagon Champion, Match Stick Soccer Champion Blade X may be famous one day Blade X may be famous one day Blade X's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    wow this feels like wut would have happened if Kenshin Himura had broken his oath to nvr kill again. I like it dude. Look forward to reading more

    Thanks for the siggy Ky-lyrra

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    Warrior Monk kedar may be famous one day kedar may be famous one day kedar's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    Neat poem! I like it very much. The meaning is beautiful, and the word suited properly, which gave more of poetic structure to this poem. (^^) Yes, like Blade already mentioned, this poem kinda reminded me of Kenshin as well yet it is quite different at certain angles, in a way. So, awesome work, bud! I haven't seen a lot other poems of yours, so please do share, if you have them written.

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    You's Trollin Pro Leafblower Champion, Helicopter Champion ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    This poem is pretty interesting man, i like the way you wrote it, keep up the good work.

  6. #6
    Nisou Tenshi Hot Shots Champion, Elroy Learns To Fly Champion, Daves Castle Hunt Champion, Mom-Jongg! Champion, Uncle Sam Champion Priestess Angel may be famous one day Priestess Angel may be famous one day Priestess Angel's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    Wow, I am impressed! This is really good. You wrote it very well and I like the rhythm of the poem. Keep up the good work!

  7. #7
    Hell Enforcer George Wants Beer Champion, Monkey Cliff Diving Champion, Tilt 2 Champion hellknight may be famous one day hellknight may be famous one day hellknight's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    this kind of reminds of a game i play

  8. #8
    Newbie whitefoxdemon may be famous one day whitefoxdemon may be famous one day whitefoxdemon's Avatar
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    Re: Broken Oath

    Thanks. It is based on Kenshin Himura. It seems like something he would do.

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