Crimson Lust

I love you how your eye's
drip with blood like crimson
tear's on a moonless night
the fear you felt must have been
so wonderfull as you lay there
begging me for a quick and mercifull
death but i laugh.
What is this you die from my fear?,
how could you if you could have
only le me taste you freashly
dripping blood but you ded from
fright oh how i wish you wouldnt
have.
Every time i see your motionless
body i smile knowing your blood
was not wasted on the floor,
it was captured and kept
for when that crimson thirst
strike' me once again.
Ahhh the way the salty sweet
and warm taste of your life went
down my throat was a testament
to how much fear you had.
Truly as i see you motionless
body i do feell for you because
you died so quickly and with out
a scream from that beautifull
voice i knew you had .
To know that i could have
had a few hour's to drink 'you
now deprives me of hearing you
scream please for give me.
My crimson Lust it call's me
beckon's me i will never give up
my cromson lust.

i was going for a gore theme
here from a vampire's point of view
not sure if i got what i wanted from it
but any comment or critisism is weclomed

Ahhh the way the salty sweet
and warm taste of your life went
down my throat was a testament

That was awesome! I liked it alot! OMG you wrote that!? *bows*

Its almost like you said it in one breathe. Its so seductive and gruesomely dark. I think you've captured a vampire's thought so completely!!!!!!

. . . a sicko wanting for blood.. jst like the titled said, "crimson lust". ^^lll


evil. i sense an evil spirit here! XD

way to go chris-san! that was very evil and evil it was! XD yay! sweet beauty of evilness! XD

thanks im glad you think i got what
i wanted from it i am workig on othe
r stuff like this but i was wanting to
just how much i need to work on the gore
of the poem thank you again

Hey! I love it! I like how you describe pretty well. Vampire's thoughts! =O

Vampires ! I love stories bout them :D

Would appreciate if it was aligned neatly...it's sorta messy to be honest o.O
And also grammatic errors...not tryin to be picky but yeah....maybe u shud try doing it on Words....
Nice work though ^_^

thanks i will try words then i didnt really know how long
long the liness should be i sort guessed at the length of
of the lines

sweet desrciption of the taste of blood, the lust for more........man r u a vampire? lol

anyways sweet poem dude