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Thread: Crimson Lust

  1. #1
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Crimson Lust

    I love you how your eye's
    drip with blood like crimson
    tear's on a moonless night
    the fear you felt must have been
    so wonderfull as you lay there
    begging me for a quick and mercifull
    death but i laugh.
    What is this you die from my fear?,
    how could you if you could have
    only le me taste you freashly
    dripping blood but you ded from
    fright oh how i wish you wouldnt
    have.
    Every time i see your motionless
    body i smile knowing your blood
    was not wasted on the floor,
    it was captured and kept
    for when that crimson thirst
    strike' me once again.
    Ahhh the way the salty sweet
    and warm taste of your life went
    down my throat was a testament
    to how much fear you had.
    Truly as i see you motionless
    body i do feell for you because
    you died so quickly and with out
    a scream from that beautifull
    voice i knew you had .
    To know that i could have
    had a few hour's to drink 'you
    now deprives me of hearing you
    scream please for give me.
    My crimson Lust it call's me
    beckon's me i will never give up
    my cromson lust.

    i was going for a gore theme
    here from a vampire's point of view
    not sure if i got what i wanted from it
    but any comment or critisism is weclomed
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  2. #2
    Devoted Otaku Nympho may be famous one day Nympho may be famous one day Nympho's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    Ahhh the way the salty sweet
    and warm taste of your life went
    down my throat was a testament


    That was awesome! I liked it alot! OMG you wrote that!? *bows*

    Its almost like you said it in one breathe. Its so seductive and gruesomely dark. I think you've captured a vampire's thought so completely!!!!!!

    I'm a glass child. I am Hannah's regrets. Monster.

  3. #3
    Stray Sheep Aya-kun may be famous one day Aya-kun may be famous one day Aya-kun's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    . . . a sicko wanting for blood.. jst like the titled said, "crimson lust". ^^lll


    evil. i sense an evil spirit here! XD

    way to go chris-san! that was very evil and evil it was! XD yay! sweet beauty of evilness! XD
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  4. #4
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    thanks im glad you think i got what
    i wanted from it i am workig on othe
    r stuff like this but i was wanting to
    just how much i need to work on the gore
    of the poem thank you again
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  5. #5
    Otaku For3v3r_Lost may be famous one day For3v3r_Lost may be famous one day For3v3r_Lost's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    Hey! I love it! I like how you describe pretty well. Vampire's thoughts! =O

  6. #6
    Elie Jelly elie26 may be famous one day elie26 may be famous one day elie26's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    Vampires ! I love stories bout them

    Would appreciate if it was aligned neatly...it's sorta messy to be honest o.O
    And also grammatic errors...not tryin to be picky but yeah....maybe u shud try doing it on Words....
    Nice work though ^_^

  7. #7
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    thanks i will try words then i didnt really know how long
    long the liness should be i sort guessed at the length of
    of the lines
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  8. #8
    AO's Demon Slayer Hexxagon Champion, Match Stick Soccer Champion Blade X may be famous one day Blade X may be famous one day Blade X's Avatar
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    Re: Crimson Lust

    sweet desrciption of the taste of blood, the lust for more........man r u a vampire? lol

    anyways sweet poem dude

    Thanks for the siggy Ky-lyrra

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