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Thread: Dead man...

  1. #1
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    Dead man...

    Walking by the road side.
    Looks down all the time.
    His face is blank.
    Empty and hollow.

    Walking with towards no destination.
    People passing by says "hello" but,
    he did not reply to any of them.
    He would sigh and shrugs as he walk.

    Walks near a railroad,
    he sneared and grinned sinisterly,
    for he heard a train coming nearer.
    He stops there.

    ....

    The fast pace of a train,
    is as fast as his heart beat.
    A drop of tear came out,
    From each of his cold dead eyes.

    Stared to the sky he did.
    Turns around and walk like he did before.
    Again with no certain direction.
    Like he always did.

    Silence he may seem,
    but his mind is screaming.
    It is so loud till he can't think normally.
    Tormented he is.

    He chose to keep his sufferings.
    Never to mention to others.
    Not even to his loved one's.
    He will suffer and he wants to face it alone.

    ....

    He always dreamt of a better life.
    His hopes never came true.
    It makes him very frustrated,
    enraged him and burns his heart from the inside.

    He may seem alive and well.
    Sadly the truth always hid himself.
    For he is unwell,
    for he is dead by the inside... the dead man...

    A man i foresee in my dreams.
    A man who used to smile and laugh.
    A man like me.
    A man that is me, i am the dead man.
    Last edited by RayMe; Apr 21, 2007 at 01:45 PM.

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  2. #2
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Dead man...

    This is a really weird poem... Quite interesting tough... It makes you wonder what this man is thinking...
    I like your other poems more (like Dripping, Poisonous insaity and Slowly ofcourse) but this is quite good too.

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  3. #3
    Rawr~ :3 Boxteroid Champion, flyplane Champion, Home Run Champion, Bubbelfutsch Champion, Fire Fighter Champion, Brendans Soccer Champion, Movie Star Match-Up Champion, Total blackout Champion, Text Your Reflexes Champion, Scary movie Champion, Hulk Smash Up Champion, Star Wars Champion, Extreme Snowboarding Champion, Air Disc Champion, Action Fish Champion, A Game Of 3 Halves Champion, Battleball Champion, Hacky Sack Champion, FAD 2003 Champion, SQRL Golf Champion, Dr Yeckyl and Mr Ride Champion, Sky Glide Champion, Flyer Champion, Finnair Champion, Drachenjagd Champion, Canyon Glider Champion, City Surfing Champion, Action Driving Game Champion, Extreme Rowing Champion, Kardahdg Champion, Acceleracers Track Mod Champion, Final Test Champion, Du Wichtel Champion, Pedal Power Champion, Camera Killer 2 Champion, Bike Mania on ICE Champion, ATV Winter Challenge Champion, Caliber Dash Champion, Diesel and Death Champion, Snow Ride Champion, Camera Killer Champion, Pepsi Jet Ski Champion, Bumper Cars Championship Champion, Drifting Champion, Get A Grip Champion, Rooney on the Rampage Champion, Death To Ninja Champion, Kung Fu Hustle 2 Champion, Muay Thai Champion, Metal Arm FAWEGE Champion, Knife Champion, Classroom Fighter Champion, Nobuyuki Forces 3 Champion, Caddeva Champion, Sewer Dweller Champion, Angel Mart Champion, Snowy Champion, Bola Champion, Boiler Room Champion, Bobcat Champion, Amazon Quest Champion, Booty Champion, Five Errors Champion, Mind Your Marbles Champion, Angel Fruit Champion, Binggrae Champion, Candy Shoot Champion, Imperial tiles Champion, Himalayaya - Yeti Strikes Back Champion, Terrorist Attack Champion, Americas Army Champion, Special Operations Champion, Destroy the robots Champion, Cubicle Warfare Champion, Battle Field Champion, Weapons Dealer Champion, Army Copter Champion, Flat War Champion, Terrorist Alert Champion, Bully Basher Champion, Reaktor Champion, Bungee Rescue Champion, The Contraptor Champion, Boris Champion, Carling Cold Champion, Paddleball Champion RayMe is making a name for themselves RayMe is making a name for themselves RayMe's Avatar
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    Re: Dead man...

    Hmm.. it seems u like this type of poems... about death...

    heheh.. sigh... ^^ yea this guy is a little something like me.. real weird...huh?
    i wonder the same.. what would he be thinking.. wait.. i know..what he is thinking...he is me..of coarse i know.. he is the persona i created.. ^^

    im thinking of making an ending to this poem...would u like it?
    it is incomplete.. thats why it gives no certain feeling after reading it...
    i mean.. the ending is kinda a bummer right?

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  4. #4
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Dead man...

    Yeah, you're true... I like your poems about death!
    And if you think that this poem needs an ending than it really does... I quess it realy has a felling of incomletness...

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  5. #5
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    Re: Dead man...

    There i edited it.... what do u think of it now... ? or should i add somemore..?
    @.@

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    Re: Dead man...

    Much better, I think!!! Now it does explain some thing that made me wonder... It think it's complete now (though you shouldn't put much trust only on me )! And did it take only these few minutes?

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  7. #7
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    Re: Dead man...

    Yeah.. like 4 to 5 minutes i think.. ^^
    lol surprised? but i still kept a little of the mysteries in it.. ^^ i like making ppl wonder..

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  8. #8
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Dead man...

    Yeah... it's good to make people wonder and think, that's what art's ment to do!
    And yes, I'm suprised by how fast you wrote these lines because they're really good.

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

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