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Thread: Do you remember me now?

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    Otaku fma1012 may be famous one day fma1012 may be famous one day fma1012's Avatar
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    Do you remember me now?

    Hey, do you remember me?
    I’m that girl who would smile at you.
    Call you on the phone every minute of your life.
    The one who wants to be your wife.
    Think I’m strange?
    Yea, maybe I am a little deranged.
    But it’s not my fault
    You’re the one who added salt…
    Into my life.
    But dude, I feel like your cutting me with a knife.
    You are nice, cute, smart, athletic, and everything else.
    So why does my heart feel like it got stabbed?
    Oh yeah…
    It’s because we can only be friends
    But hey,
    do you remember me?
    I’m that girl who makes you go wild.
    Remember that,
    Cuz’ I know I will.
    ----
    Do you remember me now?
    -----------
    Yeah, I know you do.


    Hey guys, this is a poem about a friend of mine who I use to like when I was little. I don't know why, but for some reason I felt like writing about him. Anyways, I want to hear your thoughts bout this.


    Thanks lifeforce! (:

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    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Do you remember me now?

    Hmmm... it was nice... quite different from others, it has its own style therefore it's hard to say: "you did wrong there and there and there!" the flow seemed nice... and it's simple and short and interesting to read. And has this odd emotion in it, brought me back to my childhood... *sighs, daydreams* yea....

    The only part I didn't think was that nice was this:
    You are nice, cute, smart, athletic, and everything else.
    lol ^^ it's all ok 'till "and everything else"... that is just so odd... and "but dude" is also something that just didn't seem to fit in this poem. I know only one person who could put such words in a serious poem and still make it look good (that's sprout ) and it asks a lot of talent or a lot of "ease" to your life..

    But I will be looking forward for more ^^ cheers!

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

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