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Thread: The dove

  1. #1
    Newbie zig93 is off to a good start
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    The dove

    I know form memorys visions of the
    past love dosent fade there powers
    will last

    Do you know just how I feel or do
    you lie is it real unshore like the dove
    flying free burning love is binding me

    consumed with oppsion call it a cures
    love or lust wich ever strikes you worst

  2. #2
    Newbie fallenangel25 is off to a good start fallenangel25's Avatar
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    Re: The dove

    could use a little more length..great perspective.definatly needs a spell check.but other than that,keep it up zig!
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    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: The dove

    very cool but like fallen said more length it felt like you could have added
    to it it dosnt seem finished yet to me because i thought where was the rest of it?

    i hope to read another because this poem really is good bt it just dosnt seem
    finished like i said.
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  4. #4
    Newbie zig93 is off to a good start
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    Re: The dove

    I was only 12 when I wrote that. I was looking through my things and found it.Do you really think that it needs to be longer? Thank you for your kind words and I am really glad that you liked it. I will write some more after I get over this writters block.

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