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Thread: Everything You Gave Me!!

  1. #1
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Everything You Gave Me!!

    I love you no matter what
    I will always be there for you
    I think your the best thing to happen to me
    Your my one and only we will never be apart

    These lies i have always trusted them
    These feelings they have always kept you safe
    That smile it always made my heart melt
    Your touch it made me feel so woderfull

    My heart it's nothing but a shell
    My love it has turned hope in to desperation
    My smile it could kill you with a bend of my lips in an angry moment
    Your life it sickens me now that i know you

    The pain you will never no my pain and how the
    world looks ugly from these eye's of hatred you made.
    Trust how did i ever do this knowing you were just a lie
    in a world i thought was truth.
    Anguish this is what i feel along with the pain you
    weild never more will i use love for myself.
    Gone these moments are that i had and i wish they
    never happend becuase all they do is make my life living hell.


    ok this is another poem i did im still having problem near the
    end with makeing the sentences shorter . any help or comment would
    be apreciated so i could work on this problem
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  2. #2
    Otaku royal cutie pain may be famous one day royal cutie pain may be famous one day royal cutie pain's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    O.O wow, brother i never knew u were a poet! i felt the feelings and emotions in the poem. it was very nice


  3. #3
    Otaku Heartless_mage may be famous one day Heartless_mage may be famous one day Heartless_mage's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    you are a poet...........ahhahahahah..................but good poem..........and a trick if you want to make the sentences shorter...........use more sentences........i do it all the time.............can you tell..............

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  4. #4
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    ok cool i will try that oh yea mage i have another poem thats pretty good somethink it is anyway check it out and tell me what you think its called tears of pain
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  5. #5
    Otaku N!tr0-Glyc3r1n may be famous one day N!tr0-Glyc3r1n may be famous one day N!tr0-Glyc3r1n's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    very good poem Chris....keep up the good work


    thank u SasuraiHell
    go -=NOOBZ=- clan!

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    Otaku Clow Sakura may be famous one day Clow Sakura may be famous one day Clow Sakura's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    very good holder.. Yeah, i really think that you should make the last verse shorter. But keep it up!
    Smileys + Me =

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    Sorrow's Angel Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    I think it's awesome. I loved it.I could feel ever emotion form the poem.It was just wonderful.Great job,no wait...Awesome job lol
    Made by- Ryomakurosaki (Thank you sooooo much!!) ^__^

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    Thanks for the memories princesslady may be famous one day princesslady may be famous one day princesslady's Avatar
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    Re: Everything You Gave Me!!

    yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! chris is a poet!!!!!!!!!!1

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