Woah... Your sorrow and desire to be honest with yourself and that person really comes across nicely. Though the feelings might be incomprehensible to people who haven't gone through what you have, to people that have, you've pretty much stolen the words out of their mouths. The whole wanting to be honest thing somehow reminds me of Anna and Kitty from
Because I'm giving you my confession
That I'm wearing a fake smile
I'm giving you my confession
That deep down inside:
I wanna cry
I wanns scream
I wanna curse the world
All because....I can't be your girl.
It's alright, really it is. I'll be just fine
I rather be told the harsh words of the truth
Than the kind words of a lie.
And I'm alright
You can't help what you feel
I rather you be happy with her
But inside I can't help what I feel.