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Thread: Fall in love

  1. #1
    Hell Enforcer George Wants Beer Champion, Monkey Cliff Diving Champion, Tilt 2 Champion hellknight may be famous one day hellknight may be famous one day hellknight's Avatar
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    Fall in love

    I know she loves me
    She took my heart
    So many times
    Ever since from the start

    I look at her face
    Watching her beauty
    I listen to her voice
    Her words go right through me

    I take her everywhere
    Her smiles I love so much
    Sometimes I wonder
    If I please her and such

    Am still working on the rest, so can you guys tell me how good this is?

  2. #2
    Banned CTD High Jump Champion, Cop-For-This Champion, Soap Bubble Champion, Gandys Quest Champion, Kill Time in Your Office Champion, Slow Motion Champion, Moodys Magical Eye Champion, The Fridge Champion, Dangerous Fishing Champion, Panda Golf 2: Christmas Edition Champion, Driving Mad Champion, Head to Head Champion, Super Headers Champion, Penguin Arcade Champion, Chopper Challenge Champion, Air Dodge Champion, Chopper Chase Champion, F/A-18 Hornet Champion, Snow Boarding Champion, Spaceman Bob`s Great Escape Champion, Space Cowboy Champion, Rons Free Fall Champion, Gandys Quest Champion, Black Dragon Champion, Samegame and Champion, Mayan Mask Champion, 42 Games Champion, Cubedelic Champion, Smaugs Schatkist Champion, Python Champion, Thor Towers Champion Mini Dev is off to a good start
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    Re: Fall in love

    whoa u really have a good sense of words keep up the good work and don't let anyone tell u it's rubbish cos that is sum series work well done keep up the good work

  3. #3
    Newbie Forcefly is off to a good start Forcefly's Avatar
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    Re: Fall in love

    you need to use some punctuation though. other than that it is pretty good.

    Thanks to FLawed love the sig.

    Pressure makes gems, Ease makes decay.

  4. #4
    Angelic Lasura may be famous one day Lasura's Avatar
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    Re: Fall in love

    I like it very much... a good work indeed... be sure to continue it!!!! ^^
    You can really feel love in this one... very lovely...

    My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

  5. #5
    Newbie picoboca is off to a good start
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    Re: Fall in love

    keep up te good work i like it...but don't let her take your heart again

  6. #6
    God Of Angelz Submarine Champion, Rocket Racer MX Champion, Pencak Champion, Grand Prix Challenge 2 Champion, Twelve Swap Champion, Penguin Pass Champion, Crab Volleyball Champion, Hockey Shooter Champion, Trick Master Funky Champion, Mah-Jong Connect Champion, W.R.A.X. Champion dark1angel may be famous one day dark1angel's Avatar
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    Re: Fall in love

    This poem is really good on a occasion this really describes on your feelings towards this person if you had been thinking about her which was really upsetting to you but really great job keep on working on the rest hope to see more. ^-^

    Magic intervenes when there is love in first sight.
    |アスタロス|

  7. #7
    「Someone」 Goo Slasher Champion, Fish Kill Champion, Rapid Motion Champion, Cell-Out Champion, Sober Santa 2 Champion, Flower Girl Champion KuwiRules145 is off to a good start KuwiRules145's Avatar
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    Re: Fall in love

    How cute and romantic!!! Your love for that person is just so adorable! I hope to read more of your poems!!!!
    「When I'm sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead」

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