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Thread: Falling

  1. #1
    Otaku Mattness may be famous one day Mattness may be famous one day Mattness's Avatar
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    Falling

    As nations fall as dirt to earth;
    When people walk, the ground upturned;
    The bulidings crumble as life boils from the soul;
    Relidgion brakes down as people returned;
    God and country leave their toll;
    with love's devotion comes our rebearth.


    When you narrow things down...
    Love is salvation, Death is freedome.


  2. #2
    Domme Kasai may be famous one day Kasai may be famous one day Kasai's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    There's a spelling error, however nice job.
    Seduced by Flesh


  3. #3
    Otaku Mattness may be famous one day Mattness may be famous one day Mattness's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    OK, I will fix that later. Any other feedback would be cool. Thanks for the check!


  4. #4
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    Re: Falling

    hmm yup.. good job on the poem.. all there is the truth... can't deny that
    scary but true.. :/ and u need to correct them spelling.. sheesh :x

    Legion Ketsueki Lives on~!!
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  5. #5
    Otaku god of death may be famous one day god of death may be famous one day god of death's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    well its an inspiring peice of work, short but i think thats how you ment it.
    nice work ill be looking forward to seeing more
    I am the God Of Death, Reaper of the souls, hunter of the darkness......
    http://z13.invisionfree.com/Deaths_doorway/index.php
    this is my site come and see me there sometime!

  6. #6
    NalaMidnight Eggs Champion P.R. Princess may be famous one day P.R. Princess may be famous one day P.R. Princess's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    O.O THAT WAS GOOD. I like it soooooo much.
    The nations falling to the ground as dirt to earth
    I like that part. O.O It soo good. I hope to see more of you work

    ~Falling in love one step at a time~
    ~ MYSPACE~AWESOME PLACE TO SAVE~

  7. #7
    Femmebot Rehab Colt Crouse Champion, Bookworm Champion, Hangman Champion, Connect 2 Champion Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows has become well known Peach_follows's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    Excellent poem... Reminding me so much of the senseless war and chaos that is taking place in the all over the world.
    ... Not Ever Again...

  8. #8
    Otaku Just Pitching Champion, Mile High Club Champion, Penguin Dive Champion, Gold Strike Champion Darkened_Star may be famous one day Darkened_Star may be famous one day Darkened_Star's Avatar
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    Re: Falling

    Not so much sure about the love being salvation, but the death part I agree. ^_^ I like your wording in this poem. I look forward to reading more, mattness.

    Come dance in the rain with me, no one is watching.

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