There are no choices in the voice,
I look above the sun that shines upon us.
There aren't any ways that your getting away,
From my gaze that lurks beyond the haze.
Without a doubt I stare at your thoughts,
Twisting and turning within your mind.
Racing to get to your destination,
I move on in what you may call frustration...
There is a ripping feeling I get inside,
Right in front of me, the sweat pearls down my skin.
My mind tries to run away from reality,
Yielding it to keep in touch with what lies ahead.
Nothing else matters right now,
Lowering the head but once,
Could spring despair upon all that count on you.
The only thing I think about,
Nothing else than doing my best!
I end it in a bang,
A fusion of resonating souls as one.
The explosion blows the flow of dissonance,
Recreating the mellow that went with yellow.
Crashing into a world of artificial meanings,
Protruding a rush of natural life.
Yelling, screaming, letting everything out,
Making the dream come true,
Breaking the shell that kept me from you!
Inspired by listening to the anime: BECK
Note: Unrevised...so that's that!
wow...so many powerful words..i can't compete with that even if it's not in the contests @.@ good work~! go and break them walls between~!! i'll support you~!! whoo~!!!
With what you just said, I regret not being able to participate in the contest....me and my big mouth...wanting to be a judge again...grrrr!!!
Oh well, it was done for fun, so fun it was :)
Thankyou for the kind words, especially the "powerful" part which I totally agree with after re-reading myself. I highly suggest the anime "BECK", I sped through it in 2-3 days and well, it was AWESOME!
Gimme a "V", for vocabulary. And you used yours quite effectively with this.
The imagery this put in my mind was dark. And it had an alien (yes, i mean the space kind) feel to it... Like somone struggling to break from a cacoon. Or being captured in a pod or vessel of some sort, And your crying out for someone. either that... Or I watch too many movies and need more sleep.
Awesome poem Soldat, being a big fan of Beck I can hear the words in a different light but even outside of that they carry such power and emotion. Your diction also amazes me sometimes, you use such a board range of it and yet none of the words seem forced. 10's from me ;)
wow that was amazing and so awsome good work you are awsome at that and i cant wate to reed more it was awsome and so reel
Thanks all, especially Peach and Chief who particularly offered some good insight.
And watching the anime really helps to understand this writing as chief pointed out ;)