Forever

I Hate being aways from u but i know oneday i can see u again.
i will break down this wall so u can hold me in your arms once more.
plz dont give up on me.i am doing all i can to get to u but plz know i will love you forever

:2thumbs:wow thats poems short
but its sweet
and its straight to the point i really like it
will there be more
people really do love to read poems and others
on here keep it up:2thumbs:

im not really all that good at poems i just throw this one together ...but yea

Awww... this is so sweet and this just perfectly says how I feel!!!!!!!!!! And I don't even feel like this should be longer, this says everything to me. But that is maybe only because I know all about being away from the one you love *giggles*

Well I hope to see more ^^ cheers!!!! Oh... maybe one suggestion- maybe you shouldn't use shortenings in poems...

agreed on Lasura on that one... poetry is language... :) better write it fully.. would make the poem seem more mature...and grammar too.. :)

Walls... nice methaphore... it symbolizes many things... (bad ones) and i understand this poem... its written nicely and simple... easy to understand... keep it up ^^

Well this one is a bit better in the way it's structured. But again it sounds not like a poem with a message, it sounds more just like a message or desperate plea.

Spelling and grammar needed a little polishing.

But eh, what can I say that I haven't on the other one?

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c1...iker/stamp.jpg