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Thread: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

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    Otaku Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi's Avatar
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    Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    The chapel, was dark and lonely the shadows enevloped the pews and the soft rain faintly hit the staind glass faintly.
    "Your sin is beyond the grace of God." Ky yelled. Sol stood under the broken glass as the rain fell upon him.
    "God? I dont want anything to do with him..." Sol yelled as he lifted his hands. Small flares circled his body, then a huge burst imploded from Sol's fists.
    "Grand Viper!" Sol's body bursted into a flame as he slid towards ky. a firey trail was left behind sol. "Ride of lightning!" Ky charged as a electric ball forged around him. He dashed towards Sol. The impact of the two blades smashed and sent both of them flying back. "Sol, desist right now I must take you in. By the word of the sacred order of Holy Knight I--"
    "Oh cut the bullshit Ky, can't you see? This world wasnt ready for the sacred order of the holy knights. We gears control everything and theres nothing you can do....." Sol smirked.
    "Then why? why are you hunting gears?" Ky asked.
    "heh, you'll see in due time." Sol then bursted into a flame and and blasted his way through the rain and into the sky. The light Sol luminated from his flame dispated into the night.
    ----

    thats just a test for my fanfic of Guilty gear. some of the words are from the anime promo on GGX. So.. if its good enough I'll continue my fanfic. but also this story will be more understandable to thsoe who played Guilty gear.

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    Newbie thedivineshadow may be famous one day thedivineshadow may be famous one day thedivineshadow's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    seems good enough but i havent played gg at all so i cant relate to the characters you wrote about
    the battle is pretty good but i think it could be alittle more detailed to add depth. maybe add colors, or maybe just add to the length of the battle, they took one swat at eachother. not much of a competition of testosterone you expect from two hotheaded guys.
    maaybe add more to the scenery. you have it raining and just outside a church. that is good. but is it windy? thundering?, since its raining maybe make mention how the rain sizzled as it came in contact with the flames or something like that

    just suggestions so take it with a grain of salt so to speak.

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    Otaku Adarrah may be famous one day Adarrah may be famous one day Adarrah's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    Sounds interesting... PM me so that I can know more. lol^^
    Carve an amble now,
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    Otaku Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    Quote Originally Posted by thedivineshadow
    seems good enough but i havent played gg at all so i cant relate to the characters you wrote about
    the battle is pretty good but i think it could be alittle more detailed to add depth. maybe add colors, or maybe just add to the length of the battle, they took one swat at eachother. not much of a competition of testosterone you expect from two hotheaded guys.
    maaybe add more to the scenery. you have it raining and just outside a church. that is good. but is it windy? thundering?, since its raining maybe make mention how the rain sizzled as it came in contact with the flames or something like that

    just suggestions so take it with a grain of salt so to speak.
    ah ok thanks, I'll probably end up re-doing it. with more details I was jsut testing to see if people woul be interested in reading more.

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    Newbie thedivineshadow may be famous one day thedivineshadow may be famous one day thedivineshadow's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    fair enough ^.^ its a good start though, i would liek to read more eventually

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    Stray Sheep Aya-kun may be famous one day Aya-kun may be famous one day Aya-kun's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    baa! a GG fanfiction! ^_^ don't mind a sheep joining in to read!
    baa~ if only i can make Ky kiske my sheperd! I so love him!

    nice story.. write more and post them! ^_^ I'm rooting for ya~
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    Otaku Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi may be famous one day Zaraki Kenpachi's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    thanks all, I'll be sure to ad more details and make the story more compelling..

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    :Yuki fan: Spider Jump Champion Shinku no kage is making a name for themselves Shinku no kage is making a name for themselves Shinku no kage's Avatar
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    Re: Guilty Gear: Immoral Flame

    ....Isnt this basically the opening movie and one of the story mode ending for Ky put together and written out!?
    ->:Be descriptive in your posts or its like you didnt post at all:<-

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