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Thread: Heirarchy III

  1. #1
    Otaku -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=- may be famous one day -=Broken^Halo=-'s Avatar
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    Heirarchy III

    Heirarchy

    Part III

    Time went on, and love grew strong.
    They met in secret, however wrong.
    Afraid of their King’s fury and wrath,
    The soldier crossed not his path.

    Alone in dark they’d meet once more,
    ‘neath cover of shadow, so says lore.
    Fearful of her fathers furious ways,
    But her truest secret she’d not betray.

    In the temple they’d meet alone,
    A plan would grow to dethrone,
    And crawl from ‘neath a kings clutch,
    A couples love would end that much.
    Fr3aK~0f~N@Tu|23

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    Otaku Fallen Hero may be famous one day Fallen Hero may be famous one day Fallen Hero's Avatar
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    Re: Heirarchy III

    I went back and read the first part and it was as good as the second. I would say that the part three is well to be quite honest its one of the best poems I have seen. I guess I should save that comment for part 5 but I assume that Hierarchy complete will be a great compilation. In the mean time I will wait for you to post Heirarchy part 4.

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    Heavy Metal Goddess CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18's Avatar
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    Re: Heirarchy III

    This is a sweet story of two people determined to be together despite her father's disappoval. I had a boyfriend who my mom really disapproved of,but I stayed with him anyway cause our love was strong enough to get passed that. Good job and I look forward to reading part 4.
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    super effective Last Man Standing Champion FLawEdmiNd may be famous one day FLawEdmiNd may be famous one day FLawEdmiNd's Avatar
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    Re: Heirarchy III

    Sounds kind of like Romeo and Juliet.. except Romeo was never this battle weary knight you depict in your poem.. and well, they never really met in a chapel to do the nasty but.. there are some similarities. Great language and stuff.
    the love you withhold is the pain you carry.

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