sangogirl

I'm hopelessly, happily scared,
Because i'm thinkin' things
I've never before dared.
Our song I can't help sing,
Your name stuck in my head...
repeats it's self like a song.
I say things I don't intend.
I mess up and do things wrong.
And when your around...
I can't think straight,
I get shy , I can't make a sound,
My feelings I can't rate.
I'd be so happy if forever you stayed.
Yet there is something that gives me a scare
I can't help but be afraid,
that the smile for you I always wear,
that my feelings for you might be...
more than I ever expected.
I hope that someday you will see
that with love I'm infected.

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dark1angel

I am very pleased with the way you though out your poem, but you may have put your poem in stanza form though is not that biggy.

In ovarral you had that feeling in your poem when something or someone has infected you which you felt shy, nervous, ETC. so there is a greater tension in my opinion.
Hope you have interesting poems in very soon.

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Getting away from conflicts can get you far, but also can get you into more chaos.
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Astaroth

This poem has an unique style to it.....maybe it has something to do with the rhythm which I like by the way) or the way the words are written
But I like it very much
Very Nicely done!!!

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Lasura

Hmmm... describes the start of love very well, I remembered how that felt ^^ That was interesting..

Well I think I just need some coffe, I've read poems for far too long *giggles* but it seemed like it's a bit hard to read this because of the rythm... *reads again* No... I was wrong... the rythm is very nice, what makes it a bit odd is the way you write, here for example:
Well it's very interesting when you put the verb after the noun, but I think it made this poem harder to read, or is it just me?

Alltogether I really like it ^^ And I just love the edning (yes even though there's the odd placement of words in a sentence again)- nice way to end the poem and I've always liked it when the title appears apparently in the last lines only... ^^ well I hope to see more ^^

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My recommended fanfic: "Dreamer" by Scourge

sangogirl

yeah i tend to do that a lot even when i talk. and i can never understand what to name it so i end up using a word in the poem, and the rhythm is a little off, i'll try to change it later.

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