+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: The Lie!

  1. #1
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    someplace where the only light is the moon above
    Posts
    3,118
    Thanks
    102
    Thanked 70 Times in 64 Posts

    The Lie!

    1000 times i had your heart
    somany times it feltso real
    nothing really made that moment
    specail so i lived a little lie and said
    i loved you.

    The days they lingerd on and the
    smilesand the i love you's they seem
    tomake it real when i deny it ,i pretend
    to love you too, matters of the heart
    there so confusing.

    No matter the time of day i just cant
    love you i live this little lie that turned
    big some how never caring if it hurt you
    because i faked it,the only times i cringed were
    when you hugged me because i couldnt feel the
    same as you.


    You can live a million life times but still not
    understand that love for me just can not
    be because i just dont know how to love ,
    call me blind or even incoherant its all just words
    to me , because every moment i am with you
    makes things a little hard but not so hard
    i cant deny it.


    Why love seems so easy to push away
    i can not say , the tears you have when we kiss
    make it harder for the truth to come out ,i can
    say i love you for a millions years and still it wouldnt change
    a thing because you cant love what was never there unless
    its the shadow of something you wish was real.
    ______________________________________________
    This poem is about love and how some use its power
    to decieve and not reallylove anyone at all because all
    they know is pain ,there are ways around this if
    those who do lie or pretned to care actualy open
    there hearts which is very hard for them.

    comments and sugestions are welcomed
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  2. #2
    Chtonian Slayer Astaroth may be famous one day Astaroth's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    you really do not want to know
    Posts
    525
    Thanks
    23
    Thanked 49 Times in 47 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    wow....
    to tell you the truth...this poem is sort of consfuing to me...it hard to see the point that you are trying to make (and this is coming for the person that does not even write poetry...lol)
    and also...you have a couple of spelling and grammar mistakes...
    but the poem itself is very nicely done and it is beautiful.....
    nice job!!!
    DO NOT MAKE ME UNLEASH MY INNER DEMON

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Astaroth For This Useful Post:

    HolderOfTheDarkChalice (Feb 01, 2008)

  4. #3
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    someplace where the only light is the moon above
    Posts
    3,118
    Thanks
    102
    Thanked 70 Times in 64 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    thanks and i will work on the grammer
    a bitmore but i did just fix what i saw
    was wring with it so far but im glad you
    did like it.
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  5. #4
    Otaku Saionji is off to a good start
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    164
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 13 Times in 12 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    I like this poem alot 0_0.
    Some aspects of it...got...well confusing.
    But i'd give it an 8/10.
    Keep on writing, and i'll keep on reading

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to Saionji For This Useful Post:

    HolderOfTheDarkChalice (Feb 01, 2008)

  7. #5
    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    someplace where the only light is the moon above
    Posts
    3,118
    Thanks
    102
    Thanked 70 Times in 64 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    thanks and sorry for the confusion i treid to
    exaplin it but i will try and word it better next time
    and i realy am glad you enjoyed it.
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to HolderOfTheDarkChalice For This Useful Post:

    CherryBlossom18 (Feb 05, 2008)

  9. #6
    Sorrow's Angel Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Hidding Under The Covers hehe XD
    Posts
    688
    Thanks
    40
    Thanked 9 Times in 8 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    Wow...I can see what your were trying 2 say with this. How you let them believed that you loved them but didn't, it's heartbreaking for both sides. I really loved this.
    Made by- Ryomakurosaki (Thank you sooooo much!!) ^__^

  10. The Following User Says Thank You to Shinigami's_Angel For This Useful Post:

    HolderOfTheDarkChalice (Feb 02, 2008)

  11. #7
    Heavy Metal Goddess CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18 may be famous one day CherryBlossom18's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    a place where the stars shine as bright as the sun
    Posts
    578
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 16 Times in 16 Posts

    Re: The Lie!

    Very sweet poem and so truthful. It's kinda sad how some people seem to pretend to love you knowing they're lying. I think you should never tell anyone you love them unless you mean it cause noone deserves a broken heart.
    "Sunset Kisses Along The Beach"
    Made for me by HolderofTheDarkChalice
    Thanks so much I love it!

+ Reply to Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts