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Thread: Life of a candle

  1. #1
    Otaku raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche's Avatar
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    Life of a candle



    Life of a Candle

    In the vast darkness of night,
    As the cold wind sings a lullaby
    The shining stars are none in the tranquil sky,
    Lingering solitude is at sight.

    In a small shanty across the woods,
    Is where a white lighted candle belong,
    Producing a little light and temporary warmth
    To a father, a mother and a son.

    Time is fleeting, the candle starts melting
    Little by little the white candle’s light weakening.
    The father held his wife and his son,
    As the cold night wind blows fiercely.

    The candle in the distant starts to weep
    Hopeless to give light in the entire night
    All it wanted is to keep the family warm,
    And to shine some light for the infinite darkness.


    >thanks for reading. You may comment on this poem, if you have critiques just let me know.

    Thank you very much,Reese for this wonderful signature ^_^

  2. #2
    Newbie nightmaregirl is off to a good start nightmaregirl's Avatar
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    Re: Life of a candle

    what a lovely poem,to me there's nothing you should change just leave it ^_^

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    Fish Fingers & Custard Ice Hockey Champion, Smaugs Treasure Champion, Mini Putt 3 Champion, Ant Tracks Champion, Jungle Hunt Champion, Madnetics Champion, Manole Champion, Blokken Champion, Fast Food Fiasco Champion, Shapes Hifters Champion, Mud and Blood: Vietnam Champion HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice is making a name for themselves HolderOfTheDarkChalice's Avatar
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    Re: Life of a candle

    very awesome poem and cruel just
    like in life sure thigs llok hopless and
    just when you think all is lost and the night
    will come to a dramatic end....it dosnt the night still
    falls and the harsh reality wins once more.

    its very cool how you portray this Raja
    and its very true to life ,there isnt always
    a happy ending even when there should be
    the odds are always against you ,even when things look
    like they cant get any worse they still do.
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and all your demons
    I'll be the one to protect you from a will to survive and a voice of reason
    I'll be the one to protect you from your enemies and your choices son
    They're one in the same, I must isolate you...
    Isolate and save you from yourself

  4. #4
    Otaku raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche's Avatar
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    Re: Life of a candle

    @ chris:I am happy to seeyour comment Chris. Thanks. Yeah, there are times when life seemed so unfair and unjust.
    @Nightmaregirl: wow thanks for your comment, i do appreciate.
    Last edited by raja_psyche; Jan 31, 2007 at 04:33 AM.

    Thank you very much,Reese for this wonderful signature ^_^

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