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Thread: Loner

  1. #1
    S.E.L - sexy etna lover Baal may be famous one day Baal may be famous one day Baal's Avatar
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    Loner

    I have been depressed all the day
    my dreams have been shattred away
    Im just a loner inside a house
    that won't go to take a look outside
    A sun that never shines the shallow
    deep darkness that i allways follow
    It get's me away, from the things
    that I have allways been scared
    I had never seen smiles
    that would bring bright shine
    to my empty shell to my teary eyes
    people would call it fate
    but i never had such thing's
    because I wont be seen
    by people that dont understand
    my empty heart and dry feelins
    I will be shutdown till the sun comes down
    and while time passes and lands drown
    with my tears that are on the ground



    perdoname michelle!

  2. #2
    Domme Kasai may be famous one day Kasai may be famous one day Kasai's Avatar
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    Re: Loner

    I'm not a big fan of rhyme poems. However, I think you need to work on punctuation and capitalization.
    Seduced by Flesh


  3. #3
    You's Trollin Pro Leafblower Champion, Helicopter Champion ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro is making a name for themselves ketaro's Avatar
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    Re: Loner

    Nice emo peom (I apologize if that offends you) i really like it. keep it up man.

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    By SousukeSagara in forum Cyber Lounge
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