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Reply With Quotewow, that's really impressive, how did you come up with it?
Sweet,Bad,Nice,Mean
All of these can show this scene.
A girl who has a simple crush
This boy controls her, makes her blush.
His spiky hair,
those gorgeous eyes.
It seems to me ,
like it's all lies.
Does he notice me in the hall?
Or am I just like that plain white wall.
My heart beats fast, Can hardly breathe
He stops my actions and makes me dream.
I think I have a simple sign
of a note that says "Be mine".
Was it a mistake, or was it for me
I hope it wasn't for the girl with locker # 673.
On the bottom it says my name.
I run for joy to tell my friends
He says hi in the hallway
I say hello and nearly faint.
A girl shows up, I wonder what she wants.
"Hand off him, he was my only one"
Those words were clear, My face turned red.
Should I listen or just pretend?
"I don't care, That's why he is your ex"
"Those lies and tears, where just pretend"
"He doesn't want you, he wants me"
"Get over it, can't you see?"
----------------
Books can give you learning and be very inspirational lol.
Yeah, Bye.
wow, that's really impressive, how did you come up with it?
iluvmyloser (Oct 26, 2008)
Thank you. ^^ I don't know. I have very mixed feelings. Ask my friends. I can express them very well.
Yeah, Bye.
Though very simple, it is very expressive. It flows decently as well. I think any sort of work can be improved, and in this case, to make it flow better (old poems I've wrote always need improving). XD It's cute and simple with tons of expression which makes it very enjoyable. ^^ It was a nice read.
Teenage girls fighting over a boy... I miss those days, NOT!
Come dance in the rain with me, no one is watching.
iluvmyloser (Oct 27, 2008)
Wow..That was..Well great...
I can't really say but...
It just told so much feelings in it..
Yet just simple..
Great work..!!
I hope to read more from you..^_^
We are affraid of losing controle...But why should you be affraid of losing it...While you didnt have it...
iluvmyloser (Oct 27, 2008)
me likey princess iluv lols..... the poem is good well built. anticipation is good.
"In your arms is where i will be, I love you till my forever ends."
Clan Rainstorm 2nd Company, Kunoichi Leader
PhoenixSara FB / Click Me IMVU/Atlantis RPG/Rules and FAQ/MY BLOG /
iluvmyloser (Oct 31, 2008)
Darkened Star- Thank you. You don't know how much I have tried to make my poems better and good flowing. Thanks. ^^
mangalovertje- Thank you again. I have not written a poem in like..[[FOREVER]] dude. ^^ Gracias.
phoenixsara- Turtle dear. You're poems are wayyyyy better. I don't know what you;re talking about but thank you anyway! ^^
In all means thank you to all who said AWESOME poem or something similar. And thanks to those who read it but didn't want to criticize or comment. Still appreciate it. You guys are like totally radical.<--Yes, I'm going old school dude! B-)
Yeah, Bye.
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