Thread: Lost and alone.

This was short, sweet and straight to the point. I really like how the first half of the poem rhymed. Although, once it stopped rhyming I did have to re-read it just to make sure I wasn't seeing things. It woulda been better, had the rhyming continued. But it wasn't bad! ^_^

I wish someone would help me out,
Offer me a light.
A light so that I could see,
Just where I need to be.


I like that line. It reminds me alot of my own poetry. ^_^ You did very well on this one, Chan. Mad props!

It's really hard for me sometimes to continue to rhyme without killing my message, because I focus too much on the rhyming part and it limits my vocabulary so much, which in turn limits my abilities to put togather a good sentance. It reminded me alittle of your poetry too.

Nicely done bratling however might I suggest using 4 lines for each of your stanzas? might make it easier to follow. anyways nice rithim and rhime. keep it up I hope to see more from you. (later of course)