Love

*equinn* · Oct 06, 2006, 01:11 AM

Love is it good or bad
Because it can be a heart brake
Or an ever lasting love
So what kind of love would you like?
Because I know witch one I would like
So what about you a love
Over all love all love
For wealth and good looks
So witch one are you like.

*Mr. K* · Oct 06, 2006, 01:17 AM

o.o hmmmm~

Seems more like info giving than a poem~

But it all works out in the end.

Use better wording, and be more free with it. It feel like Facts

Beside that. I like poems, so of course I am going to like this one~

*Rave_Grip* · Oct 06, 2006, 01:44 AM

Hehe what Kat said, use better wording and make a lil more bigger. As usual your poems are realistics and I loved them ^.^

BlueFox1 · Oct 06, 2006, 04:34 AM

I would have to say I would take a love over all love! This poem really didn't seem like a normal poem, but still expressed what the writer was trying to say. Good job!

Pride_Edward · Oct 06, 2006, 04:39 AM

The poem is kinda short and some spellings are wrong,spellcheck is needed too so that the readers could understand it better. Equinn,maybe you can do a better job next time...as for this poem,its short but meaningful...
By the way Equinn,did you mean heart break or brake? Just clearing things up...A good poem critic corrects all the wrongs of a poem and its better than it isn't corrected...

*equinn* · Oct 06, 2006, 10:31 AM

ok thanks for that and i will really try to do longer ones (if i can)

Sazzy · Oct 06, 2006, 12:26 PM

sounds a bit weird...but it could be one that turns into a great poem if reworked

Oct 06, 2006, 01:11 AM	#1 (permalink)
equinn Ao's official cat girl~★ Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Emerald island (Eire) (Ireland) Posts: 1,601 Thanks: 10 Thanked 19 Times in 19 Posts Credits: 16,042	Love Love is it good or bad Because it can be a heart brake Or an ever lasting love So what kind of love would you like? Because I know witch one I would like So what about you a love Over all love all love For wealth and good looks So witch one are you like. __________________
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Oct 06, 2006, 01:17 AM	#2 (permalink)
Mr. K THUMBSUCKING ADDICTION Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Alaska Posts: 1,266 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Credits: 3,203	o.o hmmmm~ Seems more like info giving than a poem~ But it all works out in the end. Use better wording, and be more free with it. It feel like Facts Beside that. I like poems, so of course I am going to like this one~ __________________ ≥°≤ [?] █▓▒░░▒▓█ [?] ≥°≤ ◕ ◡ ◕;;;;[?]
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Oct 06, 2006, 01:44 AM	#3 (permalink)
Rave_Grip I hate idiots on AO. Kill Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Life is an illusion. Posts: 2,314 Thanks: 0 Thanked 11 Times in 11 Posts Credits: 14,832	Hehe what Kat said, use better wording and make a lil more bigger. As usual your poems are realistics and I loved them ^.^ __________________ Wherever you see, there is always 98% of people who love something; and 2% that don't. I'm pretty sure that not ALL 98% of peeps don't support Lolita or anything. So if you agree, put it in your sig. \| .:~My AO Gallery~:. \| \| .:~The AO Rules~:. \|
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Oct 06, 2006, 04:34 AM	#4 (permalink)
BlueFox1 Upcoming Legend Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: A place called Midnight Sun know as Tranquility Posts: 584 Thanks: 8 Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts Credits: 1,176	I would have to say I would take a love over all love! This poem really didn't seem like a normal poem, but still expressed what the writer was trying to say. Good job! __________________
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Oct 06, 2006, 04:39 AM	#5 (permalink)
Pride_Edward Diamond in the Rough Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 247 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Credits: 110	The poem is kinda short and some spellings are wrong,spellcheck is needed too so that the readers could understand it better. Equinn,maybe you can do a better job next time...as for this poem,its short but meaningful... By the way Equinn,did you mean heart break or brake? Just clearing things up...A good poem critic corrects all the wrongs of a poem and its better than it isn't corrected... __________________ Our own site: http://www.fma-adikz.tk
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Oct 06, 2006, 10:31 AM	#6 (permalink)
equinn Ao's official cat girl~★ Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Emerald island (Eire) (Ireland) Posts: 1,601 Thanks: 10 Thanked 19 Times in 19 Posts Credits: 16,042	ok thanks for that and i will really try to do longer ones (if i can) __________________
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Oct 06, 2006, 12:26 PM	#7 (permalink)
Sazzy Member of 22 yr old Club Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: In my imagination restricted by British Society! Posts: 1,798 Thanks: 7 Thanked 15 Times in 12 Posts Credits: 32,460	sounds a bit weird...but it could be one that turns into a great poem if reworked __________________ FAVOURITE THREADS EXPLAIN why, or risk an infraction. *Will no long use any signatures.. only on forums that appreciate my effort.*
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