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Thread: Love Forever

  1. #1
    ♥ (¯'·._.·[GEISHA ゲイシャ]·. HieisLove may be famous one day HieisLove may be famous one day HieisLove's Avatar
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    Love Forever

    The kiss of you lips
    My world brightens
    You hold me in your arms
    My hope rises
    I breathe for you
    My tears you wipe away
    Forever I want it to last
    I keep myself from melting
    Baby my heart pounds hard
    Your name I love to say
    Your sweet kisses I crave
    Your warmth I love
    You whose my other half
    Our souls connect
    By the touch of your hand
    My body shivers
    A smile appears on my face
    My eyes sparkle
    Me you love
    You I love
    Forever it maybe
    ♥ (¯'·._.·[GEISHA ゲイシャ]·._.·'¯) ♥

  2. #2
    Otaku Kaijudozero may be famous one day Kaijudozero may be famous one day
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    This is a nice poem
    your structure fits the theme of the poem well
    great poem!!
    Emotions tend to lose their strength when put in words, So I prefer to speak only what is absolutely necessary..

    Kaijudozero.deviantart.com

  3. #3
    ♥ (¯'·._.·[GEISHA ゲイシャ]·. HieisLove may be famous one day HieisLove may be famous one day HieisLove's Avatar
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    thank you. I'm glad you like it.
    ♥ (¯'·._.·[GEISHA ゲイシャ]·._.·'¯) ♥

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    Domme Kasai may be famous one day Kasai may be famous one day Kasai's Avatar
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    Re: Love Forever

    Hmm. I like the choice of words, just not the wording. Lol.

    The kiss of your lips
    brightens my world.
    You hold me in your arms,
    my hope rises.

    Something like that wouldve have made the poem a little bit more enjoyable. Good job.
    Seduced by Flesh


  5. #5
    Otaku raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche may be famous one day raja_psyche's Avatar
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    Re: Love Forever

    This poem expresses love. i liked the way you express those feelings into words. Your poem fills my mind with imagery.
    Great job. ^^

    i suggest, to divide this poem into stanzas.
    Also to use punctuations is a must too...

    Thank you very much,Reese for this wonderful signature ^_^

  6. #6
    Sorrow's Angel Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel may be famous one day Shinigami's_Angel's Avatar
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    Re: Love Forever

    Awesome Cierra!!! I could soooo feel the love from this poem!! Awesome job!!
    Made by- Ryomakurosaki (Thank you sooooo much!!) ^__^

  7. #7
    Devoted Otaku BlueFox1 may be famous one day BlueFox1 may be famous one day BlueFox1's Avatar
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    Re: Love Forever

    the emotion of love is so strong in the is poem and it really get that across to the reader! In my personal opinion great job!!! And I definitely agree with Shini!

  8. #8
    Newbie evil_neko_youkai may be famous one day evil_neko_youkai may be famous one day
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    Re: Love Forever

    Cecee its beautiful like all of your work. keep it up gurl

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